collapse collapse

Please donate to help towards the costs of keeping this site going. Thank You.

Recent Topics

Unai Emery by LeeB
[Today at 12:23:27 PM]


Summer 2025 Transfer Window - hopes, speculation, rumours etc. by Tuscans
[Today at 12:12:19 PM]


Aston Villa Women 2025-26 by cdbearsfan
[Today at 12:10:18 PM]


Alex Moreno - Gone by danno
[Today at 12:04:49 PM]


Villa Park Redevelopment by paul_e
[Today at 11:47:27 AM]


Morgan Rogers - PFA Young Player of the Year 24/25 by paul_e
[Today at 11:41:52 AM]


Squad 25/26 by brontebilly
[Today at 11:29:00 AM]


Kits 25/26 by Tuscans
[Today at 11:08:34 AM]

Recent Posts

Re: Unai Emery by LeeB
[Today at 12:23:27 PM]


Re: Unai Emery by danno
[Today at 12:14:39 PM]


Re: Summer 2025 Transfer Window - hopes, speculation, rumours etc. by Tuscans
[Today at 12:12:19 PM]


Re: Aston Villa Women 2025-26 by cdbearsfan
[Today at 12:10:18 PM]


Re: Alex Moreno - Gone by danno
[Today at 12:04:49 PM]


Re: Unai Emery by Lsvilla
[Today at 11:54:41 AM]


Re: Villa Park Redevelopment by paul_e
[Today at 11:47:27 AM]


Re: Alex Moreno - Gone by Brend'Watkins
[Today at 11:47:18 AM]

Follow us on...

Author Topic: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede  (Read 27187 times)

Online PaulWinch again

  • Member
  • *
  • Posts: 55186
  • Location: winchester
  • GM : 25.05.2026
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #105 on: January 10, 2016, 05:20:56 PM »
As I've said elsewhere he is the least imposing target man I've ever seen. He makes no use of his physical size and the rest of his game wouldn't look out of place in a primary school kick around. I fear his time at Blackburn was an anomaly. Look at the rest of his career, his record is atrocious. At Cardiff he scored 7 in 55.

Offline Ads

  • Member
  • Posts: 42982
  • Location: The Breeze
  • GM : 17.04.2024
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #106 on: January 10, 2016, 05:30:06 PM »
If you're to play up front on your own then you need to be mobile and have some physicality. Gestede has neither.

He could get on the end of an Amavi crosses and that is really it. He is an abysmal player.

Offline UK Redsox

  • Member
  • *
  • Posts: 42879
  • Location: Forest of Dean & Fenway Park
  • GM : 10.02.2026
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #107 on: January 10, 2016, 05:51:58 PM »
My point was that there are several players not worthy of wearing a villa shirt right now, or being premier league footballers, and I just don't see why he has a whole thread dedicated to how useless he is, when the team is full of poor players. I think it's unfair

Don't worry as I think this will be a regular feature and they'll all get a turn...next up, 101 Uses for Ashley Westwood


Offline brian green

  • Member
  • Posts: 18357
  • Age: 87
  • Location: Nice France
  • GM : 19.06.2020
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #108 on: January 10, 2016, 05:52:41 PM »
He cannot judge goal kicks. His height and limited jumping ability is lost because he jumps at an angle while the defender jumps vertically.  If he does make contact it is with the side of his head so the ball is never knocked down accurately. It just skids anywhere.

Offline Bad English

  • Member
  • Posts: 45481
  • Age: 151
  • Location: Pyrénées Catalanes, France
  • I am Perpignan Villa
  • GM : 29.03.2025
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #109 on: January 10, 2016, 05:56:55 PM »
Had Gestede been around in the Seventies, he could have been a stand in for Lee Majors during Steve Austin's "bionic running' scenes in the Six Million Dollar Man


Offline brian green

  • Member
  • Posts: 18357
  • Age: 87
  • Location: Nice France
  • GM : 19.06.2020
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #110 on: January 10, 2016, 06:00:47 PM »
Don't know about Steve Austin Darren but he would make a hell of a stand in for Austin Powers.

Offline Ian.

  • Member
  • *
  • Posts: 15701
  • Location: Back home in the Shire
  • GM : 09.01.2026
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #111 on: January 10, 2016, 06:03:13 PM »
My point was that there are several players not worthy of wearing a villa shirt right now, or being premier league footballers, and I just don't see why he has a whole thread dedicated to how useless he is, when the team is full of poor players. I think it's unfair

Don't worry as I think this will be a regular feature and they'll all get a turn...next up, 101 Uses for Ashley Westwood


Brilliant! However he'll never win Cruffs, you need ability, agility and obedience.

Offline supertom

  • Member
  • Posts: 18827
  • Location: High Wycombe, just left of Paradise.
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #112 on: January 10, 2016, 06:08:19 PM »
He improves numbers at the Emile Heskey Fan Club.

Offline Nunkin1965

  • Member
  • Posts: 3445
  • Age: 59
  • Location: Planet Earth
  • This is only a problem.
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #113 on: January 10, 2016, 06:16:06 PM »
Not the best striker I've ever seen by any stretch but the stinking service he gets from his team mates doesn't help much.

Online pauliewalnuts

  • Member
  • *
  • Posts: 74632
  • GM : 28.08.2025
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #114 on: January 10, 2016, 06:26:27 PM »
Gestede is not alone in being not good enough, but what makes him different is the degree to which he is not good enough.

I don't get the "amazing in the air" thing. He isn't. He's a big fucker who manages to lose way more aerial duels than he wins. For a big fucker he has zero physical presence, too.

His ball skills are lamentable. It's like he's playing in leg braces or orthopaedic shoes or something.

The fact we replaced the guaranteed goals of Benteke with Gestede is just utterly laughable. Whoever made that decision needs to be sacked.

Offline Jockey Randall

  • Member
  • Posts: 1044
  • Location: Shattered Dreams Parkway
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #115 on: January 10, 2016, 06:34:38 PM »
Is it a wonder his confidence has gone though, and he's not alone in that regard. I find this thread pretty distasteful to be honest. Singling him out when there are several poor players seems a bit like just picking the easy target. He didn't buy himself

Boo frickin hoo. This bloke is on a monster wage and can't even be bothered to achieve the minimum requirement of being arsed. He's built like a brick shithouse, yet allows even League 2 centre halves to bully him. These players need to grow a fucking pair
I can accept him being crap, he's not the only one, what I can't accept is that he doesn't make the required effort, he doesn't move, doesn't challenge for the ball or use the few attributes he does possess for the team's benefit.

Spot on. These players need a rocket up their arse, not tea and sympathy.

Obviously it's never going to happen but I think it would be interesting to see the reaction of the players if everyone turned up and was fully 100% behind them even after they produce yet another slack pass or missed chance. They haven't reacted all season to the anger and frustration vented their way, making them feel they're not as bad as they really are might see them play slightly better?

this has to be a wind up?

apart from the last two games what anger has been vented at them?

they have had the full support of fans

It wasn't a pop at the fans in any way. I should have specified it was more of an observation of how football fans in general react in our situation. I.e would the players react differently to an army of fans who remained 100% positive throughout a game regardless of any setbacks the team met. Could it make a difference? Obviously this is football and there will always be fans at any club who turn when things go sour on the pitch.

Offline Nunkin1965

  • Member
  • Posts: 3445
  • Age: 59
  • Location: Planet Earth
  • This is only a problem.
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #116 on: January 10, 2016, 06:36:07 PM »
Gestede is not alone in being not good enough, but what makes him different is the degree to which he is not good enough.

I don't get the "amazing in the air" thing. He isn't. He's a big fucker who manages to lose way more aerial duels than he wins. For a big fucker he has zero physical presence, too.

His ball skills are lamentable. It's like he's playing in leg braces or orthopaedic shoes or something.

The fact we replaced the guaranteed goals of Benteke with Gestede is just utterly laughable. Whoever made that decision needs to be sacked.

Got to agree with that one. Who the hell made that call. Unless real money was spent Benteke was always going to be a tough act to follow.

Offline Jockey Randall

  • Member
  • Posts: 1044
  • Location: Shattered Dreams Parkway
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #117 on: January 10, 2016, 06:39:54 PM »
Gestede is not alone in being not good enough, but what makes him different is the degree to which he is not good enough.

I don't get the "amazing in the air" thing. He isn't. He's a big fucker who manages to lose way more aerial duels than he wins. For a big fucker he has zero physical presence, too.

His ball skills are lamentable. It's like he's playing in leg braces or orthopaedic shoes or something.

The fact we replaced the guaranteed goals of Benteke with Gestede is just utterly laughable. Whoever made that decision needs to be sacked.

I don't know how many he's won compared to how many he's lost but according to whoscored he's won an average of 6.5 aeriel duels a game which is the best in the league so far.

Offline oswald funkletrumpet

  • Member
  • Posts: 2157
  • Location: Hayley Green
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #118 on: January 10, 2016, 06:45:00 PM »
My point was that there are several players not worthy of wearing a villa shirt right now, or being premier league footballers, and I just don't see why he has a whole thread dedicated to how useless he is, when the team is full of poor players. I think it's unfair

Don't worry as I think this will be a regular feature and they'll all get a turn...next up, 101 Uses for Ashley Westwood



quality lol

Offline oswald funkletrumpet

  • Member
  • Posts: 2157
  • Location: Hayley Green
Re: 101 Uses for Rudy Gestede
« Reply #119 on: January 10, 2016, 06:46:55 PM »
Don't know about Steve Austin Darren but he would make a hell of a stand in for Austin Powers.

more like a dummy in austin reed

 


SimplePortal 2.3.6 © 2008-2014, SimplePortal