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Author Topic: Situation Vacant  (Read 9282 times)

Online dave.woodhall

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  • Posts: 64206
  • Location: Treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry.
Situation Vacant
« on: February 03, 2011, 03:49:19 PM »
A position has arisen in the direct sales and marketing team of a prestigious matchday publication. PM me if you'd like to join our happy band.
Logged

Offline Lucky Eddie

  • Member
  • Posts: 2202
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #1 on: February 03, 2011, 04:00:10 PM »
Is the company car a montego?
Logged

Offline Ozzjim

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  • Posts: 31350
  • Location: Here.
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Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #2 on: February 03, 2011, 04:02:36 PM »
Who did you fire Dave? Wasn't for sexist comments about female fanzine distributors was it?
Logged

Offline Irreverent ad

  • Member
  • Posts: 1064
  • Location: Bolton
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #3 on: February 03, 2011, 04:04:37 PM »
Is the matchday publication Razzle? Always buy after a loss....makes me feel better!

If so any perks?
Logged

Offline richl

  • Member
  • Posts: 1137
  • Location: Ramsbottom, very up north
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #4 on: February 03, 2011, 04:37:19 PM »
Can i work from home????
Logged

Offline TimTheVillain

  • Member
  • Posts: 4447
  • Location: Location
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #5 on: February 03, 2011, 04:45:47 PM »
Have you got a deal with Big Terry ? - i.e. 'all you can eat burgers' as remuneration ?
Logged

Offline Eckybloke

  • Member
  • Posts: 1461
  • Location: Dundee
  • GM : 06.06.2019
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #6 on: February 03, 2011, 04:54:37 PM »
Do I get travelling expenses from Dundee?
Logged

Offline D.boy

  • Member
  • Posts: 7358
  • Location: Out of my mind, back in 5 minutes.
  • GM : Jan, 2013
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #7 on: February 03, 2011, 05:10:54 PM »
Those applying must be water resistant and have current life insurance cover.
A CSE in maths is an advantage.
Those with previous "hard sell" experience will go to the front of the queue.
Logged

Offline Fergal

  • Member
  • Posts: 20960
  • Location: worksop
  • GM : July, 2013
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #8 on: February 03, 2011, 06:22:39 PM »
Quote from: D.boy on February 03, 2011, 05:10:54 PM
Those applying must be water resistant and have current life insurance cover.
A CSE in maths is an advantage.
Those with previous "hard sell" experience will go to the front of the queue.

Yea the front of the queue at the bar....
Logged

Online Legion

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  • Oh, it must be! And it is! Villa in the lead!
    • Personal Education Services
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #9 on: February 03, 2011, 07:04:50 PM »
Quote from: dave.woodhall on February 03, 2011, 03:49:19 PM
A position has arisen in the direct sales and marketing team of a prestigious matchday publication. PM me if you'd like to join our happy band.

What have you sacked me for?
Logged

Online dave.woodhall

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  • Posts: 64206
  • Location: Treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry.
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #10 on: February 03, 2011, 10:00:50 PM »
Quote from: Legion on February 03, 2011, 07:04:50 PM
Quote from: dave.woodhall on February 03, 2011, 03:49:19 PM
A position has arisen in the direct sales and marketing team of a prestigious matchday publication. PM me if you'd like to join our happy band.

What have you sacked me for?

You haven't been sacked, you're being given an assistant.
Logged

Offline joe_c

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  • Posts: 13519
  • Location: My secret hayloft, shot with shafts of afternoon sunlight
  • GM : 31.03.2020
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #11 on: February 03, 2011, 10:14:32 PM »
Quote from: dave.woodhall on February 03, 2011, 10:00:50 PM
Quote from: Legion on February 03, 2011, 07:04:50 PM
Quote from: dave.woodhall on February 03, 2011, 03:49:19 PM
A position has arisen in the direct sales and marketing team of a prestigious matchday publication. PM me if you'd like to join our happy band.

What have you sacked me for?

You haven't been sacked, you're being given an assistant.

Can you get one on a YTS?
Logged

Offline WALTERS WARRIORS

  • Member
  • Posts: 3875
  • Location: The planet called "Ward End"
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #12 on: February 04, 2011, 02:13:35 AM »
Would me letting you sleep with my misses, push me to the front of the queue ?
Logged

Online Legion

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  • Posts: 60043
  • Age: 54
  • Location: With my son
  • Oh, it must be! And it is! Villa in the lead!
    • Personal Education Services
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #13 on: February 04, 2011, 06:59:59 AM »
Quote from: dave.woodhall on February 03, 2011, 10:00:50 PM
Quote from: Legion on February 03, 2011, 07:04:50 PM
Quote from: dave.woodhall on February 03, 2011, 03:49:19 PM
A position has arisen in the direct sales and marketing team of a prestigious matchday publication. PM me if you'd like to join our happy band.

What have you sacked me for?

You haven't been sacked, you're being given an assistant.

God help him/her.
Logged

Offline UK Redsox

  • Member
  • *
  • Posts: 43299
  • Location: Forest of Dean & Fenway Park
  • GM : 10.02.2027
Re: Situation Vacant
« Reply #14 on: February 04, 2011, 08:31:20 AM »
I will continue in my capacity as Legion's unofficial sales assistant.

I am sure that a detailed statistical analysis would show that his sales dramatically increase when I'm stood by him.
Logged
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