Aston Villa v Swansea City Post-Match Thread

[adrenachrome]

Paul Lambert is hopeful of seeing Christian Benteke and Ron Vlaar back available again for the New Year's Day clash with Sunderland.

Talismanic striker Benteke [knee] has been absent for Stoke, Palace and Swansea matches.

Reliable defender Vlaar [calf], meanwhile, has missed the Fulham, Man Utd, Stoke, Palace and Swansea games aswell as the second half at Southampton.

Lambert is anticipating welcoming Benteke and Vlaar back at the Stadium of Light.

Asked about the availability of the pair, he said: "Benteke and Vlaar will hopefully come back pretty quick.

"Hopefully there's a good chance [against Sunderland].

"These aren't fringe players, these are big, big players for us.

"It's the spine of the team.

"Everyone knows that when you lose the spine of the team it can be a big hit.

Where the fuck is Talismania?

[damon loves JT]

If you look at a map of Australia, it's the bit that looks like a piece of dried shit hanging off a sheep's arse. I think Glenn McGrath is from there

[olaftab]

I'd love to watch a team like Swansea every week. Some of their football was great today.

Yes and they have 21 points from 19 games.

[adrenachrome]

Cheers, Damon. Gotta love The Pidgeon.

[brian green]

Makes a change from iconic.   Odd use of English.   Traditionally a talisman is something small.   Neither of those two gents fits that description.

[adrenachrome]

Fuck me, this is a Talismanian Devil:

[BoldmereVilla]

Another turgid, boring, embarrassing home display.
First 20 mins ok with Gabby and Weimann down the middle, we actually moved the ball around and had good pace upfront and chased and harassed Swansea's back four.

After that bloody hell !!! We got a real lesson in how to keep the ball and pass to your own players !
I actually thought Clark and Baker defended well today but the full backs are woeful, our midfield is embarrassing, Delph seems to have retreated back to his old ways of turning backwards and our so called strikers were woeful.

At half time Lambert changed the formation again with just Gabby upfront and it looked like he wanted to hold on to what we had !

As I have said before all his buys are the same, there is no one on the bench that offers any difference, 7m for Libor (wow) I honestly believe we are in serious trouble this season and if we don't go down it wont be thanks to Lambert it will be that amazingly there are three teams shitter than us.

[olaftab]

For the Palace game when we had most possession the toilet cubicles were all occupied by men smoking.   For the Swansea game when we had least possession the cubicles were occupied by men throwing up.

Possession without goals makes you nervous and in need of a cigarette.   Lack of possession and hanging on to a point makes you sick.

Discuss.   Use both sides of the paper.

Excellent observation. Maybe you should write a paper and submit it for consideration in The Costa Coffee Short Story Awards?

[pauliewalnuts]

re Delph turning backwards, I noticed that, too but thought it was because he'd find himself with the ball and absolutely nobody would move in to space to take it off him.

[brian green]

Talismanians eat those for breakfast.   It's the jack jumpers that scare them shitless.

[PeterWithesShin]

I'm more worried about why Brian is hanging around the toilets so much!

[pauliewalnuts]

I honestly believe we are in serious trouble this season and if we don't go down it wont be thanks to Lambert it will be that amazingly there are three teams shitter than us.

Fortunately, there are several really poor sides this season.

[BoldmereVilla]

With regards Delph turning backwards all the time, it could well be that there is no movement ahead of him, but earlier in the season he was driving forward and taking players on. I wonder if Lambert has told him to stop doing that as he seems to be playing deeper as well.

[brian green]

Thanks olaftab.   I am promised to Channel 4 but it has a really subtle layering.   I shit my pants while waiting for a vacant cubicle and the man in front of me had some sort of chemical withdrawal seizure.    The joke of the week was the guy who sits two seats along from me and my kids said the Palace game was so boring he found reading the prostate cancer adverts in the toilets was the most interesting thing he had done all day.   My son the king of drollery said he was saving that pleasure for half time.

[olaftab]

My half time Balti pie contained more chicken than was expected and the sauce was fine.

Please express the total content in percentage terms for it to make any sense to us?