The James Milner Meeting - Name The Refreshments Etc

[mattjpa]

[*shellac*]

Our first signing this season is a Portugeezer.  Nice one, MON to bring us Abel Xavier.

[Mac]

Surely the minutes of the last meeting will clear up any ambiguiity.

It is characteristic of all committee discussions and decisions that every member has a vivid recollection of them, and that every member's recollection of them differs violently from every other member's recollection; consequently we accept the convention that the official decisions are those and only those which have been officially recorded in the minutes by the officials; from which it emerges with elegant inevitability, that any decision which has been officially reached would have been officially recorded in the minutes by the officials, and any decisions which is not recorded in the minutes by the officials has not been officially reached, even if one or more members believe they can recollect it; so in this particular case, if the decision would have been officially reached, it would have been recorded in the minutes by the officials and it isn't so it wasn't.

[TonyD]

There will be plenty of cake and arse.

[BannedUserIAT]

Milner, should he mention the words "Manchester" and "City" should be served Arse Biscuits.

Should he mention the words  "Manchester" and "City" combined with "Bye bye", then MoN should give him a knuckle sandwich.

[themossman]

As an aside, fuck me I hate doing minutes.

[olaftab]

MON looks  up at the Agent "Who the f*uck are you?"

Agent: I am Mr Milner's agent.
MON: Now where is Mr Milner?
Agent: He is here sitting behind me.
MON leans to one side looks at Milner: Oh yes there you are.  You should be on the training pitch.
MON: What do you want?
Agent: Mr Milner would like a move?
MON: What again ...I moved him just after christmas?
Agent: Yes but he would like to move out now.
MON: What  to the right? James do you want to move out to the right?
Milner: No Boss I am happy where I am.

MON looks at the Agent. Agent looks at Milner. Milner squeals "What have I said what have I said..I am happy where I am"
Agent frog marches Milner out ...meeting is adjourned.