Summer 2010 Transfer Thread: B*llsh*t, Rumours & Wishes

[JJ-AV]

Riquelme on a free to West Ham. Interesting...

[Mazrim]

From the mirror. GET IN

Fulham have made an official approach for Aston Villa midfielder Steve Sidwell and slapped a bid in.

Villa boss Martin O'Neill has to sell-to-buy this summer after cut-backs by owner Randy Lerner.

And Sidwell is one of several stars including Curtis Davies, Nigel Reo-Coker, Nicky Shorey and Luke Young who may be sold.

Sidwell has made 23 Premier League starts for Villa since a £5million move from Chelsea in July 2008.

Villa are looking to recoup around £3m and get his £50,000-a-week salary off their wage bill as Sidwell will be a free agent next summer.

And the Londoner is ready to return to the capital to revive his stalled career.

Premier League rivals West Ham and Sunderland also fancy the former Arsenal trainee.

But Craven Cottage is his likely destination after Fulham boss Roy Hodgson made an early move to get the ace.

And Sidwell is willing to take a pay-cut for regular first team football.

Aaaaargh!!!!
Fuck off Mirror. FUCK. OFF!

[Mazrim]

Riquelme on a free to West Ham. Interesting...

Why?

[MattW]

Shane Warne: "I've waited 2 years for another chance to humiliate you."

Daryll Cullinan: "Looks like you spent it eating."

I know it's off topic, but that's an interesting signature.

Cullinan scored 4/11 against Warne in tests and averaged 12.75 in 12 tests against Australia. He scored 8/242 against Warne in ODIs, and was dismissed by Warne every 2.75 matches he played against him.

Yeah, but its still good sledging.

Sure, but it loses its punch when a Warne flipper catches him in front four balls later... again.  

A sledge becomes good when it's in the context of establishing psychological superiority over your opponent. Warne was much stronger mentally than Cullinan.

Good example: "You just dropped the World Cup" - Steve Waugh to Herschelle Gibbs in the Super Sixes stage of the '99 World Cup after Gibbs dropped a dolly at midwicket with Waugh early in his match-winning dig of 120*.

Link

[MattW]

Shane Warne: "I've waited 2 years for another chance to humiliate you."

Daryll Cullinan: "Looks like you spent it eating."

I know it's off topic, but that's an interesting signature.

Cullinan scored 4/11 against Warne in tests and averaged 12.75 in 12 tests against Australia. He scored 8/242 against Warne in ODIs, and was dismissed by Warne every 2.75 matches he played against him.

Yeah, but its still good sledging.

Just edges out Ian Healy's advice to Shane Warne v Sri Lanka many moons ago. On getting Arjuna Ranatunga out of his crease: "Put a Mars Bar on a good length, that should do it."

That is good. Or Healy in response to Ranatunga's request for a runner: "You don't get a runner for being a fat c.nt".

[Rip Van We Go Again]

I still think Mods should ban any speculation about overseas signings.

It's a waste of time for anybody to read.

Folan from Hull is more likely than Forlan from Athletico.

[Mazrim]

Well if only people who got the better of Warne were allowed to sledge him he'd hardly ever have heard a peep out of batsmen. Something Warne would have regretted, I'm sure.

Take for example, walking wicket Eddo Brandes. The great Glenn McGrath was being thwarted by his unlikely rearguard and said to him;"Eddo, why are you so fat?" Brandes promptly replied: "Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit."

Now that's good sledging.

[Rip Van We Go Again]

How about Merv Hughes for Australia?

I forget who he was bowling against, but he sent 3 down that the batsmen played and missed, then told him.

'I'll send a fucking piano down next and see if you can play that.'

He was on the receiving end against Robin Smith.

Smith came out to the crease and Hughes said
'What the fuck are you doing playing for England, you're a shit batsmen.'

First ball, Smith bladders it for 4 and says to Hughes

'We make a fine pair don't we? I can't bat and you can't fucking bowl.'

[Mazrim]

Apologies to non Cricketing fans to be hijacking the thread momentarily in the absence of Villa transfer gossip but then again, if you dont like Cricket there's something wrong with you and deserve it.


Sir Ian Botham and Rod Marsh?
When Botham took guard in an Ashes match, Marsh welcomed him to the wicket with the immortal words: "So how's your wife & my kids?" Beefy responded: “The wife's fine – the kids are retarded.”

[MattW]

Well if only people who got the better of Warne were allowed to sledge him he'd hardly ever have heard a peep out of batsmen. Something Warne would have regretted, I'm sure.

Take for example, walking wicket Eddo Brandes. The great Glenn McGrath was being thwarted by his unlikely rearguard and said to him;"Eddo, why are you so fat?" Brandes promptly replied: "Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit."

Now that's good sledging.

Indeed. McGrath's wife copped a bit, apparently. Exchange with Ramnaresh Sarwan:

McGrath: "What does Brian Lara's dick taste like?"
Sarwan: "I don't know, ask your wife"

McGrath's wife was undergoing treatment at the time for what was eventually fatal breast cancer.

He responded: "If you ever mention my wife again, I'll rip your fucking throat out." Sarwan made a ton.

Video link

[Mazrim]

And a good Villa fan, God rest her soul.
To be fair, I'd have pulled Sarwan's head off so McGrath handled it quite well.

[Chris Smith]

Well if only people who got the better of Warne were allowed to sledge him he'd hardly ever have heard a peep out of batsmen. Something Warne would have regretted, I'm sure.

Take for example, walking wicket Eddo Brandes. The great Glenn McGrath was being thwarted by his unlikely rearguard and said to him;"Eddo, why are you so fat?" Brandes promptly replied: "Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit."

Now that's good sledging.

Indeed. McGrath's wife copped a bit, apparently. Exchange with Ramnaresh Sarwan:

McGrath: "What does Brian Lara's dick taste like?"
Sarwan: "I don't know, ask your wife"

McGrath's wife was undergoing treatment at the time for what was eventually fatal breast cancer.

He responded: "If you ever mention my wife again, I'll rip your fucking throat out." Sarwan made a ton.

Video link

Typical Aussie, can dish out but can't take it.

[VillaZogmariner]

He may be a rat faced ****** - but this is my favourite ever sledge...

Ricky Ponting and Shaun Pollock.

After going past the outside edge with a couple of deliveries, Pollock told Ponting: "It's red, round and weighs about five ounces." Unfortunately for Pollock, the next ball was hammered out of the ground. Ponting to Pollock: "you know what it looks like, now go find it."

[Mazrim]

He may be a rat faced c*** - but this is my favourite ever sledge...

Ricky Ponting and Shaun Pollock.

After going past the outside edge with a couple of deliveries, Pollock told Ponting: "It's red, round and weighs about five ounces." Unfortunately for Pollock, the next ball was hammered out of the ground. Ponting to Pollock: "you know what it looks like, now go find it."

I thought that was Greg Thomas bowling to Viv Richards?

[BannedUserIAT]

Well if only people who got the better of Warne were allowed to sledge him he'd hardly ever have heard a peep out of batsmen. Something Warne would have regretted, I'm sure.

Take for example, walking wicket Eddo Brandes. The great Glenn McGrath was being thwarted by his unlikely rearguard and said to him;"Eddo, why are you so fat?" Brandes promptly replied: "Because every time I make love to your wife, she gives me a biscuit."

Now that's good sledging.

Indeed. McGrath's wife copped a bit, apparently. Exchange with Ramnaresh Sarwan:

McGrath: "What does Brian Lara's dick taste like?"
Sarwan: "I don't know, ask your wife"

McGrath's wife was undergoing treatment at the time for what was eventually fatal breast cancer.

He responded: "If you ever mention my wife again, I'll rip your fucking throat out." Sarwan made a ton.

Video link

Typical Aussie, can dish out but can't take it.

...said Chris Smith whilst in the distance, a pot accused a kettle of being black.