2. Traffic cone

4. Tony Cascarino tribute act.

growing my sweet peas up this year

Can't even use him as a bog brush now he's cut his hair.

Laurel or Hardy.  You choose.

Can't even use him as a bog brush now he's cut his hair.

Sideshow Bob lookalike

I literally can't think of anything that he'd be any use at, even in a comedy sense.  He's just a great big gangly, lazy, utterly talentless, terrible, terrible player.  I've seen some shit at Villa over the last 35 odd years, but he's so startingly bad, there's nobody even close to being as bad he is.