I've Got A Mate...

[cdbearsfan]

Fun facts for his Ghanaian audience. It would take the average Ghanaian ninety-seven years to work long enough to be able to afford an Arsenal home ticket. Even then, it would only be a League Cup game.

Oh, and tell him Chelsea are a bunch of racists so he might want to consider picking a different team.

I suppose you could go with the Ted Drake quote "the trouble with playing abroad is people only ever want to talk about Aston Villa".

Or something like that. Dave can tell you the exact quote, it's in his book, but my girlfriend has borrowed my copy.