Heroes & Villains, the Aston Villa fanzine
Heroes & Villains => Heroes Discussion => Topic started by: Cuz on April 18, 2012, 12:56:17 PM
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Paul,
As our web site proudly boasts we are the 5th most decorated club in English football history but as with any big statement it is always best to read the small print, we have won nothing since 1996 (I am and rightly so discounting the intertoto cup)
At best now the villa compete on the pitch and in the transfer market with the stoke's, west brom's and fulham's of this world and without wanting to disparage these teams is this really how it should be?
I want to ask what has happened to the villa? Attendances down, a direct reflection of results but more accurately a statement from the fans regarding the poor state of our football. I was at the UTD game on Sunday and a more embarrassing display I have not seen; boys against men is perhaps an over used analogy but on this occasion it was evident that the side fortunate enough to wear the lion on Sunday would not have beaten a UTD second team. I am at a loss to understand the recruitment of Mr Mcleish and after the initial disbelief I hoped that perhaps I would be proven wrong, I wasn't and It is increasingly apparent that his unattractive style of play is not conducive to our club. I recognise we have an injury list but I also recognise that we should not be struggling for survival as a result, we are Aston Villa the 5th most decorated club in English football history!
A villa fan for 42 years I need to hear a positive response please Paul, with a plan for new dynamic management and sensible investment that in turn could emulate our peers at the top of the league instead of us being discussed in the same breath as those in a relegation battle.
I look forward to hearing from you.
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Good letter but I'd be surprised if he heard back.
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I'll let you know, but he like me well fooked off
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
You beat me to it.
If the content didn't make Faulkner throw it straight in the bin, the haphazard grammar and general feel of it being written by a 12 year old will.
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I'm all for good grammar, but don't put the guy down for it. Sometimes the content, the emotion, are more important than those rules and conveying that, in whatever way one can, is the real nub of things.
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Well the contents nearly as bad as the grammar, if the guy is 42 you think he would remember the really bad times and have a little bit more perspective.
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I bet Faulkner wouldn't chuck a badly spelt letter in the bin if it included a season ticket renewal application.
Although I'd like to think he wouldn't be as much of a snob as some people on here
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I'm all for good grammar, but don't put the guy down for it. Sometimes the content, the emotion, are more important than those rules and conveying that, in whatever way one can, is the real nub of things.
True enough but, like it or not, in a business setting such basic errors in English give the impression that the writer doesn't have a clue and therefore immediately takes away a lot of the impact of the letter.
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As I've said on another thread, for letter writing to be effective it needs to be unemotional and concise. Just point out facts as we know them (reduced crowds, poor home form) and then point out statements made earlier in the season regarding europe.
Even better, 1 person write a letter, have it fully proof-read and factually checked and, once it's agreed by the fans, get everyone who wants to send it to just chnge the name and sign it.
A consistent message from numerous people will hopefully be more effective.
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Reply from Paul:-
Dear mate of Cuz,
What are you writing to me for - I'm a magician!
Regards,
P. Daniels
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I bet Faulkner wouldn't chuck a badly spelt letter in the bin if it included a season ticket renewal application.
Although I'd like to think he wouldn't be as much of a snob as some people on here
It's nothing to do with snobbery. You can't expect to be taken seriously if your letter marks you out as being a bit thick.
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
Absolutely.
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I'm all for good grammar, but don't put the guy down for it. Sometimes the content, the emotion, are more important than those rules and conveying that, in whatever way one can, is the real nub of things.
True enough but, like it or not, in a business setting such basic errors in English give the impression that the writer doesn't have a clue and therefore immediately takes away a lot of the impact of the letter.
I do take your point and you're right, but he's not a business is he? Anyway, I've no wish to fall out with anyone, but 'cutting a little slack' to people when passions are running high is not a bad thing to do. The alternative just smacks of 'superiority' and is unnecessary in most contexts, certainly in this one. That's just my opinion, I'm not picking a fight.
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I sent an email to him on Monady as well, which is below. Had a voicemail yesterday from Nicky Keye asking me to call her. She's been on answerphone the times i've tried her since.
Good Afternoon Mr Faulkner.
Thank you for the Sunderland ticket email this afternoon, I was almost tempted.
But then it all hit me.
£ 35 for a Holte End Upper, K6 ticket.
£ 35 Virgin train return ticket from London.
£ 3 programme
£ 20+ Beer money ( the ONLY highlight of any Aston Villa football match)
So all in all, roughly £ 100.
Would you say it was worth it for me? HONESTLY.
Football is an entertainment industry…. And watching Aston Villa is the most boring thing going right now. I mean I love Aston Villa… but what you have made happen isn’t the Aston Villa I know and love. It’s like Birmingham City have stolen our beautiful Claret and Blue.
How did yourself & Randy Lerner come to the conclusion that Alex McLeish was the right man for Villa? He has always played a mind numbingly boring style of Football. A style of football that hasn’t even been succesful… I mean 2 relegations in 3 years!!!
Aston Villa have always had a style about them. Yes we have been pretty awful on numerous occasions, but at least we’ve given it a go. The amount of times McLeish has waved the white flag before the game had started is disgraceful. Yes we have a young team at the moment, but he was doing it when we had a fully fit squad. I mean Darren Bent more often than not was as isolated as a prisoner in solitary confinement!
I just pray this Clown doesn’t send us down. We will survive I think , just. And that is only because the teams below us are so bad it’s untrue.
You have both let this great club down massively. But mistakes do happen. The key is learning from them. The man MUST go as soon as we are mathmatically safe.
I promise you now though, you are not getting another penny from me until something is done. The same goes for an awful lot of people like me as well.
I would welcome a call from yourself or Nicola Keye if you find the time whilst writing up the mans P 45.
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I can understand why people might write a letter to Faulkner (I've been tempted myself), but I'll never understand why they want other people to read it - not particularly this one, but the one that unbelievably self righteous Chris bloke published recently.
Just tell the bloke what you've got to tell him - that's why it's in a letter. The minute it starts getting shared around on web sites or twitter or wherever, it becomes an exercise in self indulgence.
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Or, alternatively, spray COCK PISS FAULKNER down the side of his company Rover.
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Certain amount of pettiness doing the rounds today.
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Or, alternatively, spray COCK PISS FAULKNER down the side of his company Rover.
Scum. Subhuman scum.
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Reply from Paul:
Dear Mate of Cuz,
What are you writing for me for? I am the best British songwriter of my generation. What you need is a magician.
Try Paul Daniels.
Regards, P. Weller.
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Reply from Paul:
Dear Mate of Cuz,
What are you writing for me for? I am the best British songwriter of my generation. What you need is a magician.
Try Paul Daniels.
Regards, P. Weller.
Mr Weller should use that as lyrics for a new song. Be better than most of the stuff he writes. ;)
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Reply from Paul:
Dear Mate of Cuz,
What are you writing to me for? I am the biggest ****** of my generation. What you need is a deity.
Try Paul McGrath
Regards, P. Tait
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Sticking it on Manchester United headed paper would probably ensure that it at least gets read though.
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Sticking it on Manchester United headed paper would probably ensure that it at least gets read though.
Unlikely.
Lerner would snatch it straight from Faulkners hands and rush to the nearest toilet.
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It should have been a bit more to the point.
Dear Paul
YOU SUCK
Regards
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Reply from Paul:
Dear Mate of Cuz,
What are you writing for me for? I am the best British songwriter of my generation. What you need is a magician.
Try Paul Daniels.
Regards, P. Weller.
p.s. Do you know a decent barber?
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I bet Faulkner wouldn't chuck a badly spelt letter in the bin if it included a season ticket renewal application.
Although I'd like to think he wouldn't be as much of a snob as some people on here
It's nothing to do with snobbery. You can't expect to be taken seriously if your letter marks you out as being a bit thick.
I think even on here we ask for basic grammar and punctuation, but allow some liberties given the environment and platform. If you are going to send a letter worth reading, just because you think the person you are sending it to is crap at his job, don't assume that he is also thick. Paul Faulkner still has a senior high profile job, and has had similar positions outside of football. The one thing he probably isn't is thick. Communication, if it is to be taken seriously should be appropriately delivered.
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We're the fourth most decorated club not the fifth. Unless you're counting the bloody Charity Shield.
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Unless you're counting the bloody Charity Shield.
are Villa and Spurs the only teams to have won half a Charity Shield each?
Don't forget the Peace Cup
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We're the fourth most decorated club not the fifth. Unless you're counting the bloody Charity Shield.
this!!
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Unless you're counting the bloody Charity Shield.
are Villa and Spurs the only teams to have won half a Charity Shield each?
Don't forget the Peace Cup
The scousers shared it in the 80's I think. Racist FC and Everton I mean, not Tranmere.
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I can understand why people might write a letter to Faulkner (I've been tempted myself), but I'll never understand why they want other people to read it - not particularly this one, but the one that unbelievably self righteous Chris bloke published recently.
Just tell the bloke what you've got to tell him - that's why it's in a letter. The minute it starts getting shared around on web sites or twitter or wherever, it becomes an exercise in self indulgence.
Paulie you normally talk a lot of sense, but if it's the letter I'm thinking of that you are referring to I really don't know why you think the guy was self-righteous. As far as I recall he was just echoing the sentiments of an awful lot of fans who have been posting on here and other forums. Including yourself. As for self indulgence, well perhaps his motivation was more along the lines of encouraging others to do likewise - "if I can do it, so can you, and the more of us that do it, the clearer the message will be to the people running the club". At least the bloke was trying to do something to force a change in thinking. Looking at some of the posts on here there seem to be an awful lot of Villa supporters who are all too ready to demonise and ridicule anyone who tries to do that. Some appear more worried about looking like publicity seekers, or about what the media or other supporters might think, than they are about ousting the malaise from our club. Fine if you feel that way but why put down the efforts of others who decide to take some positive action?
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The scousers shared it in the 80's I think. Racist FC and Everton I mean, not Tranmere.
Just checked Wiki and Liverpool also shared it in 1964 with West Ham.
So that rounds their half up
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I can understand why people might write a letter to Faulkner (I've been tempted myself), but I'll never understand why they want other people to read it - not particularly this one, but the one that unbelievably self righteous Chris bloke published recently.
Just tell the bloke what you've got to tell him - that's why it's in a letter. The minute it starts getting shared around on web sites or twitter or wherever, it becomes an exercise in self indulgence.
Paulie you normally talk a lot of sense, but if it's the letter I'm thinking of that you are referring to I really don't know why you think the guy was self-righteous. As far as I recall he was just echoing the sentiments of an awful lot of fans who have been posting on here and other forums. Including yourself. As for self indulgence, well perhaps his motivation was more along the lines of encouraging others to do likewise - "if I can do it, so can you, and the more of us that do it, the clearer the message will be to the people running the club". At least the bloke was trying to do something to force a change in thinking. Looking at some of the posts on here there seem to be an awful lot of Villa supporters who are all too ready to demonise and ridicule anyone who tries to do that. Some appear more worried about looking like publicity seekers, or about what the media or other supporters might think, than they are about ousting the malaise from our club. Fine if you feel that way but why put down the efforts of others who decide to take some positive action?
Fr starters, it was a letter to McLeish (cc to Faulkner) asking McLeish to "do the honourable thing and resign"
Like i said - if he'd written the letter and kept it to himself, fine, but the "look at me, I done a letter!" stuff when it gets published here, there and everywhere on the internet makes it look like an exercise in vanity.
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We're 4th not fifth.
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I wrote a letter to Paul as well.
Dear Paul,
Is Simon Pegg a twat?
Cheers,
PWS
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Dear Aston Villa then spit on the page
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I've taken that from Family Guy, just to clarify
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I've taken that from Family Guy, just to clarify
That does not excuse poor grammar.
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andy gray for villa manager hes doing nothing sat in a radio station chair talking twaddle just to pick a wage up
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I've taken that from Family Guy, just to clarify
That does not excuse poor grammer.
Grammar? Or did you mean Kelsey Grammer?
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Pet name for his Grandma?
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Darling Fascist Bully Boy
Sack the manager you bastard
May the seed of your loins be fruitful in the belly of your woman
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
That, for me, is post of the year thus far.
Especially
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
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As our web site proudly boasts we are the 5th most decorated club in English football history
I hope our website is not boasting this, since we are actually the 4th most decorated club in English football history.
The Community Shield does not count.
It is not a major honour.
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That's just about your best yet Fletch.
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
Bravo.
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
Don't take it too personally Cuz. Its an age-old custom on here.
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
That's a real beauty. Can we have it sent to him?
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
It may come across as pedantic, but the truth is that anyone will take more notice of something that is properly written.
Any application forms that we used to get at our old place that were poorly written, were immediately binned.
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
There is a risk that any message will be lost if the letter is not written correctly therefore I think Risso has a valid err point.
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The Community Shield does not count.
It is not a major honour
we must be the only 3rd division side who has ever played a Charity Shield match?
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
Don't take it too personally Cuz. Its an age-old custom on here.
no problem, just thought it was a bit of a wanky thing to say
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Or, alternatively, spray COCK PISS FAULKNER down the side of his company Rover.
;D Awesome! I just spat coffee over my computer!
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
It may come across as pedantic, but the truth is that anyone will take more notice of something that is properly written.
Any application forms that we used to get at our old place that were poorly written, were immediately binned.
Jesus!! he wasn't going for a job just trying to get his valid message across I didn't post it for him to get the piss ripped out of his spelling or grammar
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
Genius post - reminds me of the Mark and Lard version
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Cuz, for what it's worth, I thought the letter was pretty much bang on. I agreed with each of the points raised. Fair play. It will be interesting to see if your mate gets a response.
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
Fantastic post.
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
It may come across as pedantic, but the truth is that anyone will take more notice of something that is properly written.
Any application forms that we used to get at our old place that were poorly written, were immediately binned.
Jesus!! he wasn't going for a job just trying to get his valid message across I didn't post it for him to get the piss ripped out of his spelling or grammar
Alright, alright.
No need to be so obstreperous.
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Cuz, for what it's worth, I thought the letter was pretty much bang on. I agreed with each of the points raised. Fair play. It will be interesting to see if your mate gets a response.
I'll let you know Ricky thanks, I didn't really notice the gammar etc just the points he made which i thought valid
UTV!!
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I didn't post it for him to get the piss ripped out of his spelling or grammar
Don't take it personally, Cuz. Your mate could have written a 900 page opus which contained one single spelling mistake, and if you'd poster it on here it would have been pounced on.
It's just what we do.
You're lucky Bad English didn't see it, mind.
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I didn't really notice the gammar
GRAMMAR.
Gammar (If you take the 'r' off') is what made The Hulk all green and lairy.
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Would my fellow posters please proof-read to ensure I am at the National Literacy Standard Level 2 before I post this letter to Mr Faulkner.
Dear Paul
FFFFFFFFFFFNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnGGGGGGGGggggggghhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yours sincerely
Witton Warrior
(not my real name)
I will performing this as a piece of street theatre in the North Stand car park at the Bolton match.
Peace.
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
It may come across as pedantic, but the truth is that anyone will take more notice of something that is properly written.
Any application forms that we used to get at our old place that were poorly written, were immediately binned.
Jesus!! he wasn't going for a job just trying to get his valid message across I didn't post it for him to get the piss ripped out of his spelling or grammar
Alright, alright.
No need to be so obstreperous.
get back to Countdown
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I didn't post it for him to get the piss ripped out of his spelling or grammar
Don't take it personally, Cuz. Your mate could have written a 900 page opus which contained one single spelling mistake, and if you'd poster it on here it would have been pounced on.
It's just what we do.
You're lucky Bad English didn't see it, mind.
Oops
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
Don't take it too personally Cuz. Its an age-old custom on here.
no problem, just thought it was a bit of a wanky thing to say
The only thing wanky was your mate's illiterate scribbling. Did he write it in green crayon?
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
Don't take it too personally Cuz. Its an age-old custom on here.
no problem, just thought it was a bit of a wanky thing to say
The only thing wanky was your mate's illiterate scribbling. Did he write it in green crayon?
whats wrong with you ????
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
Don't take it too personally Cuz. Its an age-old custom on here.
no problem, just thought it was a bit of a wanky thing to say
The only thing wanky was your mate's illiterate scribbling. Did he write it in green crayon?
whats wrong with you ????
Christ. Where to start.
Well, he's a Tory for starters.
*sorry Risso, couldn't resist*
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Very Good Paulie ;D
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
Don't take it too personally Cuz. Its an age-old custom on here.
no problem, just thought it was a bit of a wanky thing to say
The only thing wanky was your mate's illiterate scribbling. Did he write it in green crayon?
whats wrong with you ????
Christ. Where to start.
Well, he's a Tory for starters.
*sorry Risso, couldn't resist*
keyboard warrior
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
Don't take it too personally Cuz. Its an age-old custom on here.
no problem, just thought it was a bit of a wanky thing to say
The only thing wanky was your mate's illiterate scribbling. Did he write it in green crayon?
whats wrong with you ????
Christ. Where to start.
Well, he's a Tory for starters.
*sorry Risso, couldn't resist*
keyboard warrior
Yup, he's one of them too.
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Aren't we all?
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He's also completely right.
It's nothing to do with snobbery, if he writes a letter that he wants to be taken seriously then why not just take a minute or so to make sure he'd written something legible.
If I received a letter that looked as the the writer hadn't bothered to take the time or effort to read back and make sure it made sense then why would I take the time to read it?
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He's also completely right.
It's nothing to do with snobbery, if he writes a letter that he wants to be taken seriously then why not just take a minute or so to make sure he'd written something legible.
If I received a letter that looked as the the writer hadn't bothered to take the time or effort to read back and make sure it made sense then why would I take the time to read it?
How about because you're paid to?
Letter writing is a skill that not everyone has, but it doesn't make their views less valid, it doesn't mean that they're thick and nor does it make them lesser people. Snobbery is exactly what it is if you're making that kind of judgement and dismissing the content of the letter out of hand as a result! It's the same as refusing to talk to someone with a difficult accent isn't it, really?
The CEO of any organisation should ensure that all correspondence from 'customers' is treated with respect, however it is presented. It's at least a part of his job after all!
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We're the fourth most decorated club not the fifth. Unless you're counting the bloody Charity Shield.
This was the biggie for me. But full marks for taking the time to complain.
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The official website says we are the fifth most successful side? I was under the impression we were currently the fourth most successful.
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Snobbery is exactly what it is if you're making that kind of judgement and dismissing the content of the letter out of hand as a result! It's the same as refusing to talk to someone with a difficult accent isn't it, really?
No, it's not the same as not talking to somebody with a different accent. It's not even close to that.
I'd liken it more to somebody turning up to a job interview in shorts and flip-flops. It might not make that person any less suitable a candidate but you are going to leave an impression that you are judged on.
Letter writing isn't something that comes easily to everybody, but if there were something I wasn't very good at that I needed to do I'd probably ask someone for help. If I couldn't write a letter and wanted to write one that I wanted to be taken seriously I'd ask a friend or colleague to sense-check it before posting it. And particularly before passing it around my friends looking for praise.
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Snobbery is exactly what it is if you're making that kind of judgement and dismissing the content of the letter out of hand as a result! It's the same as refusing to talk to someone with a difficult accent isn't it, really?
No, it's not the same as not talking to somebody with a different accent. It's not even close to that.
I'd liken it more to somebody turning up to a job interview in shorts and flip-flops. It might not make that person any less suitable a candidate but you are going to leave an impression that you are judged on.
Letter writing isn't something that comes easily to everybody, but if there were something I wasn't very good at that I needed to do I'd probably ask someone for help. If I couldn't write a letter and wanted to write one that I wanted to be taken seriously I'd ask a friend or colleague to sense-check it before posting it. And particularly before passing it around my friends looking for praise.
I'm not looking for a fight Dave, not by any means, but it's nothing to do with a job interview. It's like complaining to any supplier. The customer should be taken seriously whatever his dress, accent or writing style and the employee on the end of it is paid to respect that!
We'll agree to differ. UTV!
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Snobbery is exactly what it is if you're making that kind of judgement and dismissing the content of the letter out of hand as a result! It's the same as refusing to talk to someone with a difficult accent isn't it, really?
No, it's not the same as not talking to somebody with a different accent. It's not even close to that.
I'd liken it more to somebody turning up to a job interview in shorts and flip-flops. It might not make that person any less suitable a candidate but you are going to leave an impression that you are judged on.
Letter writing isn't something that comes easily to everybody, but if there were something I wasn't very good at that I needed to do I'd probably ask someone for help. If I couldn't write a letter and wanted to write one that I wanted to be taken seriously I'd ask a friend or colleague to sense-check it before posting it. And particularly before passing it around my friends looking for praise.
True. If a letter is received with poor grammar, a judgement will initially be made on that basis (probably ridicule) before the content is actually addressed. The manner of any response, or lack of, will no doubt be tinged with mild condescension as they will have concluded that the author is inarticulate.
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I'm all for good grammar, but don't put the guy down for it. Sometimes the content, the emotion, are more important than those rules and conveying that, in whatever way one can, is the real nub of things.
True enough but, like it or not, in a business setting such basic errors in English give the impression that the writer doesn't have a clue and therefore immediately takes away a lot of the impact of the letter.
I do take your point and you're right, but he's not a business is he? Anyway, I've no wish to fall out with anyone, but 'cutting a little slack' to people when passions are running high is not a bad thing to do. The alternative just smacks of 'superiority' and is unnecessary in most contexts, certainly in this one. That's just my opinion, I'm not picking a fight.
Capitalising the "V" in Villa would have been a nice touch, though; it is - after all - the main topic of the letter.
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I'm not looking for a fight Dave, not by any means, but it's nothing to do with a job interview. It's like complaining to any supplier. The customer should be taken seriously whatever his dress, accent or writing style and the employee on the end of it is paid to respect that!
Fair enough, I would rephrase my point more towards standards and society as a whole rather than this particular case.
Obviously if this chap is a unsatisfied supporter then fine, he should get a letter responding to his concerns. But I'd put money on it that if the letter gets as far as Faulkner's desk, he will be reading it with the assumption that the writer hadn't even thought to check back what he had written before angrily stuffing it in an envelope. Which he clearly hasn't. And the writer will have put a judgement in the reader's mind because of that.
That's all I'm saying.
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Would my fellow posters please proof-read to ensure I am at the National Literacy Standard Level 2 before I post this letter to Mr Faulkner.
Dear Paul
FFFFFFFFFFFNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnGGGGGGGGggggggghhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yours sincerely
Witton Warrior
(not my real name)
I will performing this as a piece of street theatre in the North Stand car park at the Bolton match.
Peace.
Brilliant - just LOL
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The customer should be taken seriously whatever his dress, accent or writing style and the employee on the end of it is paid to respect that!
But surely you've heard of the phrase "First impressions count".
Like it or not, first impressions count for a huge amount when it comes to your credibility. Writing a letter in the style this one was written gives a poor first impression.
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What an absolute load of bollocks from half the posters on here , the guy is obviously as frustrated as I am pours his heart out to a disinterested wanker who appointed McShite and you lot slaughter him for forgetting to put a comma in the wrong place. Use your energies to do something similar and deluge them with letters personally written in your most eloquent style.
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you lot slaughter him for forgetting to put a comma in the wrong place
Not at all. It was remembering to put that comma in the wrong place that's the issue! ;)
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The customer should be taken seriously whatever his dress, accent or writing style and the employee on the end of it is paid to respect that!
But surely you've heard of the phrase "First impressions count".
Like it or not, first impressions count for a huge amount when it comes to your credibility. Writing a letter in the style this one was written gives a poor first impression.
Only to those judging the writer, not the content of the letter.
In a job application/interview, yes it makes a big difference because the writer's ability is being judged. In a complaining situation the writer is a 'customer', his ability with grammar and writing style is not relevant, it's only the content that matters. To dismiss such a letter based on that is judging the writer as unworthy of a reply which is snobbery and is wholly wrong! His money wasn't rejected after all, was it? So neither should his complaint be!
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What an absolute load of bollocks from half the posters on here , the guy is obviously as frustrated as I am pours his heart out to a disinterested wanker who appointed McShite and you lot slaughter him for forgetting to put a comma in the wrong place. Use your energies to do something similar and deluge them with letters personally written in your most eloquent style.
Hate to pull you up on this, but there's no need for a space before a comma.
*laughs like Stephen Fry does at Alan Davies when he says something stupid on QI*
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If people must write a letter to the club, why can't they at least get somebody who can spell and is on first name terms with Mr Grammar to give it a once over?
so you didn't understand his point then Mr Pedantic, give him a break i thought it was a good letter, shame you had to comment in that way
Don't take it too personally Cuz. Its an age-old custom on here.
"It's", not "Its", if you don't mind.
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What an absolute load of bollocks from half the posters on here , the guy is obviously as frustrated as I am pours his heart out to a disinterested wanker who appointed McShite and you lot slaughter him for forgetting to put a comma in the wrong place. Use your energies to do something similar and deluge them with letters personally written in your most eloquent style.
Quite right, I'm embarrassed by some of the posts on here written by people who think they are a lot more clever than they are. If the letter was a load of shite then say it, not get all typing pool over it.......should have used a Capital and a comma
Give me strength, whats wrong with some of you !!!!!!!
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What an absolute load of bollocks from half the posters on here , the guy is obviously as frustrated as I am pours his heart out to a disinterested wanker who appointed McShite and you lot slaughter him for forgetting to put a comma in the wrong place. Use your energies to do something similar and deluge them with letters personally written in your most eloquent style.
Quite right, I'm embarrassed by some of the posts on here written by people who think they are a lot more clever than they are. If the letter was a load of shite then say it, not get all typing pool over it.......should have used a Capital and a comma
Give me strength, whats wrong with some of you !!!!!!!
You're doing it on purpose now, aren't you?
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Once i cuttent even spel teecher now i are one!!! Recommended reading for all...Grammar for Grown-Ups by Craig Shrives. Runs for cover seeking out tin hat.
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What I will finally say on this issue is to those who have picked apart the very good letter, perhaps they should take a bit of time and send one, in my opinion it may help change a desperate situation. Some good banter on this but also some embarrassing somewhat bitchy smart arse bores. You know who you are.
UTV!!
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Why do people post these letters to the club on the internet? I honestly don't get it.
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Why do people post these letters to the club on the internet? I honestly don't get it.
I agree, it smacks of self importance. "I wrote a letter and it's so brilliant I decided to show all of you." Even when it is far from brilliant. Once you've read one, you've read them all.
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Why do people post these letters to the club on the internet? I honestly don't get it.
He didn't he sent it to the club and cc'd a few of us in it, I posted it on here for comments on content, some were upset about spellings grammar.....yawn
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Why do people post these letters to the club on the internet? I honestly don't get it.
He didn't he sent it to the club and cc'd a few of us in it, I posted it on here for comments on content, some were upset about spellings grammar.....yawn
No offence, Cuz. I just don't get the need to share it.
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Why do people post these letters to the club on the internet? I honestly don't get it.
I agree, it smacks of self importance. "I wrote a letter and it's so brilliant I decided to show all of you." Even when it is far from brilliant. Once you've read one, you've read them all.
I wrote a letter to Sir GT at the end of his second tenure and was overjoyed when he sent me a reply. I shared it through a sense of pride and respect, not self-importance. Admittedly it was far from brilliant although concise and to the point.
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Why do people post these letters to the club on the internet? I honestly don't get it.
I agree, it smacks of self importance. "I wrote a letter and it's so brilliant I decided to show all of you." Even when it is far from brilliant. Once you've read one, you've read them all.
I wrote a letter to Sir GT at the end of his second tenure and was overjoyed when he sent me a reply. I shared it through a sense of pride and respect, not self-importance. Admittedly it was far from brilliant although concise and to the point.
Sharing a reply is something different though Legion. And I can imagine a letter from Mr Taylor would bring a smile to most fans faces :)
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Why do people post these letters to the club on the internet? I honestly don't get it.
He didn't he sent it to the club and cc'd a few of us in it, I posted it on here for comments on content, some were upset about spellings grammar.....yawn
No offence, Cuz. I just don't get the need to share it.
[quote author=Rigadon link=topic=46739.msg2021474#msg2021474
No offence taken Rigadon, I thought it was quite good, I'll check with you next time
Why do people post these letters to the club on the internet? I honestly don't get it.
He didn't he sent it to the club and cc'd a few of us in it, I posted it on here for comments on content, some were upset about spellings grammar.....yawn
No offence, Cuz. I just don't get the need to share it.
[/quote]No offence taken Rigadon, I thought it was quite good, I'll check with you next time
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Ok Cuz, forgive me for saying so but you seem a little defensive, perhaps due to the grammar stuff. As I said, I meant no offence and there's no need to check with me before posting letters to the club. Just don't be surprised when, on an internet forum, you get some replies you might not agree with. That's the point isn't it?
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Ok Cuz, forgive me for saying so but you seem a little defensive, perhaps due to the grammar stuff. As I said, I meant no offence and there's no need to check with me before posting letters to the club. Just don't be surprised when, on an internet forum, you get some replies you might not agree with. That's the point isn't it?
Who was the bloke who posted his Villa rock song on here some time ago?
He asked for honest opinions, most people said it was shite and he did his nut.
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Ok Cuz, forgive me for saying so but you seem a little defensive, perhaps due to the grammar stuff. As I said, I meant no offence and there's no need to check with me before posting letters to the club. Just don't be surprised when, on an internet forum, you get some replies you might not agree with. That's the point isn't it?
I'm relaxed, no one has disagreed with the letter my mate wrote, you don't get why I posted it I was just replying
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Ok Cuz, forgive me for saying so but you seem a little defensive, perhaps due to the grammar stuff. As I said, I meant no offence and there's no need to check with me before posting letters to the club. Just don't be surprised when, on an internet forum, you get some replies you might not agree with. That's the point isn't it?
I'm relaxed, no one has disagreed with the letter my mate wrote, you don't get why I posted it I was just replying
OK, good luck to you and your mate (and his letter).
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Ok Cuz, forgive me for saying so but you seem a little defensive, perhaps due to the grammar stuff. As I said, I meant no offence and there's no need to check with me before posting letters to the club. Just don't be surprised when, on an internet forum, you get some replies you might not agree with. That's the point isn't it?
Who was the bloke who posted his Villa rock song on here some time ago?
He asked for honest opinions, most people said it was shite and he did his nut.
Who was that bloke who wrote a book about Villa's history who got the right royal hump when some people said they didn't like it?
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John Lerwill?
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Did he not have a proof reader ?
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The initial checking of text is called copy-editing, not proof-reading.
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Ok Cuz, forgive me for saying so but you seem a little defensive, perhaps due to the grammar stuff. As I said, I meant no offence and there's no need to check with me before posting letters to the club. Just don't be surprised when, on an internet forum, you get some replies you might not agree with. That's the point isn't it?
Who was the bloke who posted his Villa rock song on here some time ago?
He asked for honest opinions, most people said it was shite and he did his nut.
Who was that bloke who wrote a book about Villa's history who got the right royal hump when some people said they didn't like it?
What about the bloke who wanted us to vote for his baby in the Evening Mail competition?
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Fists all over you!
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That one was truly spectacular.
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It most certainly was. One of my all-time favourites.
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I'm not looking for a fight Dave, not by any means, but it's nothing to do with a job interview. It's like complaining to any supplier. The customer should be taken seriously whatever his dress, accent or writing style and the employee on the end of it is paid to respect that!
Fair enough, I would rephrase my point more towards standards and society as a whole rather than this particular case.
Obviously if this chap is a unsatisfied supporter then fine, he should get a letter responding to his concerns. But I'd put money on it that if the letter gets as far as Faulkner's desk, he will be reading it with the assumption that the writer hadn't even thought to check back what he had written before angrily stuffing it in an envelope. Which he clearly hasn't. And the writer will have put a judgement in the reader's mind because of that.
That's all I'm saying.
Should be "an" before a vowel. That's all I'm saying.
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Not all the time.
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It's a European game tonight. For example.
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Would my fellow posters please proof-read to ensure I am at the National Literacy Standard Level 2 before I post this letter to Mr Faulkner.
Dear Paul
FFFFFFFFFFFNNNnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnGGGGGGGGggggggghhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yours sincerely
Witton Warrior
(not my real name)
I will performing this as a piece of street theatre in the North Stand car park at the Bolton match.
Peace.
Brilliant - just LOL
Made me laugh a lot as well
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He's a useless waste of space. Another example.
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Dear Paul,
Please find enclosed my season ticket renewal form. I won't be needing it.
Thanks
UTV
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Ok Cuz, forgive me for saying so but you seem a little defensive, perhaps due to the grammar stuff. As I said, I meant no offence and there's no need to check with me before posting letters to the club. Just don't be surprised when, on an internet forum, you get some replies you might not agree with. That's the point isn't it?
Who was the bloke who posted his Villa rock song on here some time ago?
He asked for honest opinions, most people said it was shite and he did his nut.
Who was that bloke who wrote a book about Villa's history who got the right royal hump when some people said they didn't like it?
What about the bloke who wanted us to vote for his baby in the Evening Mail competition?
Ha ha, I had forgotten all about him and his "fists all over you" threat. Brilliant.
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Whatever happened to that old bloke who used to fill You Tube with his Villa songs?
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Whatever happened to that old bloke who used to fill You Tube with his Villa songs?
Don't he maybe tempted out of retirement.
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It most certainly was. One of my all-time favourites.
Unfortunately it didn't make it across as I believe it was in the announcements thread, and I couldn't see it when I went looking for his exact saying.
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It's still in GM.
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I've taken that from Family Guy, just to clarify
That does not excuse poor grammer.
Grammar? Or did you mean Kelsey Grammer?
Good Grammar ? The difference between knowing your shit & knowing you're shit ...
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Whatever happened to that old bloke who used to fill You Tube with his Villa songs?
I was thinking if he was ever found and is still around he could narrate Fletch's post on You Tube.
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It's still in GM.
Maybe for you.
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He's a useless waste of space. Another example.
Good examples from both of you.
But I think I'm going to have a hard time justifying it and claiming that I had it right on that post!
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I've taken that from Family Guy, just to clarify
That does not excuse poor grammer.
Grammar? Or did you mean Kelsey Grammer?
Good Grammar ? The difference between knowing your shit & knowing you're shit ...
Punctuation can also be more important than you might imagine.
Eats shoots and leaves.
Or:-
Eats, shoots and leaves.
(c) Lynne Truss.
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you lot slaughter him for forgetting to put a comma in the wrong place.
Isn’t that a good thing?
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Anoraks
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Anoraks
You bloody need one in this weather.
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I've taken that from Family Guy, just to clarify
That does not excuse poor grammer.
Grammar? Or did you mean Kelsey Grammer?
Good Grammar ? The difference between knowing your shit & knowing you're shit ...
Bravo.
Although I think the club are unlikely to respond to letters written to them, regardless of how well they are punctuated.
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Sir (Uncle) Doug didn't ignore my correspondence in years gone by, even if the occasional , ' - ! ? were
out of place.
It's a concern, but perhaps not a surprise, that the current CEO appears not to respond to the written word,
unlike Doug from whom I always had a reply. I occasionally bump into his secretary who informed me, perhaps
tongue in cheek, that he had a separate file of my rants.
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Best thread I have read for ages. Thanks folks.
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Best thread I have read for ages. Thanks folks.
Indeed, superb stuff.
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
Top Work
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
Top Work
Yep, very, very good indeed.
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Given postage costs are increasing on 30 April, and e-mail is the way to go, question for the prolific letter writers here. Do you use old fashioned pen and paper and post your letters, or do you type them and send them electronically?
Sad confession time - I am mildly excited when the postman delivers an envelope that's hand written.
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
That'll do it.
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
Correct me if I'm mistaken, but don't you now have to lock someone in the boot of your car and drive it into a rain flooded river ?
...Please let it be The Tumbling Bear !!!
Edit: Though I think he'd miss while trying to get in.
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I've sent Faulkner 5 letters already, all without reply.
I've just about had enough, i'm sending him one last one in tape form.
Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-The season ticket holders,
this'll be the last package I ever send your bottom
It's been letters galore and still no word - I don't deserve it
I know you got my last five letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em in crayon perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the bedroom right now, I'm sitting in my Y-Fronts by the way
Hey Paul, I drank 7 cans of Special Brew, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Black Lace, "Do The Conga"
about making a chain across the floor
It makes me think of McLeish's smiling face
When I hope you'll kick him out the door
Now it's too late - I've been to the Stoke game now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped your ticket renewal pack off the wall
I love Paul Lambert, he and the club could be together, think about it
You've ruined the club now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
I hope the ticket office ring me up and i'll SCREAM about it
I hope the empty seats eat at you and you can't BREATHE without me
Correct me if I'm mistaken, but don't you now have to lock someone in the boot of your car and drive it into a rain flooded river ?
...Please let it be The Tumbling Bear !!!
Edit: Though I think he'd miss while trying to get in.
Top marks to Fletch, aka the real slim shady, for his mastery of the inside rhyme, but nil points for putting the music of that Dildo woman back in my addled brain.
Aint no call fer it.
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If our budding scribes need any letter writing tips, they can do a lot worse than this:
If that doesn't work, I don't know what will.
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Thanks for the kind words, it's pissed some people off, but only trying to lighten the mood.
God knows we could do with a bit more humour on here.
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Given postage costs are increasing on 30 April, and e-mail is the way to go, question for the prolific letter writers here. Do you use old fashioned pen and paper and post your letters, or do you type them and send them electronically?
Sad confession time - I am mildly excited when the postman delivers an envelope that's hand written.
Letters = fountain pen
In fact for anything written I use a foutain pen.
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Thanks for the kind words, it's pissed some people off, but only trying to lighten the mood.
God knows we could do with a bit more humour on here.
I thought it was excellent, Mark.
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Sir (Uncle) Doug didn't ignore my correspondence in years gone by, even if the occasional , ' - ! ? were
out of place.
It's a concern, but perhaps not a surprise, that the current CEO appears not to respond to the written word,
unlike Doug from whom I always had a reply. I occasionally bump into his secretary who informed me, perhaps
tongue in cheek, that he had a separate file of my rants.
Doug always replied to letters. He knew my Dad and Mum as the old man helped out a bit on the old Development Association. When I wrote a detailed correspondence giving the reason why I thought it was time he stepped aside, he answered each point giving as good as he got. By this time my Dad had died but my Mum was in her 80s and still going down to games. He concluded his reply along the lines of " Im disappointed with your attitude as I remember your father well from years gone by. I did consider sending a copy of your letter to your mother showing your attitude, but didn't wish to upset her."
When I told my Mum about this she answered "Upset ? Upset ? The only thing upsetting me is he's still bloody Chairman !"
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Sorry, only just read this thread. Brilliant. Post of the season from Fletcher, I reckon.
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Reply from Paul.
Dear mate of Cuz,
I don't know why you're writing to me. I live on a farm in Surrey not a Villa.
And in future when writing to me please use my full title.
Yours Sincerely,
Sir James Paul McCartney, MBE, Hon RAM, FRCM.