Heroes & Villains, the Aston Villa fanzine
Heroes & Villains => Heroes Discussion => Topic started by: Legion on March 15, 2013, 05:09:38 PM
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(http://www.avfc.co.uk/javaImages/36/41/0,,10265~11747638,00.jpg)
Prize: DVD Book of Aston Villa
(http://i.ebayimg.com/t/THE-DVD-BOOK-OF-ASTON-VILLA-100-GREATEST-PREMIERSHIP-GOALS-/00/s/NDgwWDY0MA==/$T2eC16N,!yME9s5qF8ElBQ5(W8gjPg~~60_12.JPG)
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RL - "Has Friedel had a hair transplant since I was last here?"
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RL: Is that a lettuce sticking out of his ass?
PF: That's just the tip of the iceberg.
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The prize should go to anyone who can name all 6 men in the photo.
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"We need to get Brad back - Shay's not as focused as he used to be."
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The bloke at the top left of the photo appears to be Spider-Man.
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RL Gee Benteke looks a good goalie
PF Yes Randy
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RL oversees back pass practice.
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"Why is that soccerman touching the ball with his hands?"
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Faulkner: Not easy this is it?
Randy: Nope this is a really shit picture with fuck all funny about it, how in the hell are we going to get a decent caption out of this?
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Randy-Is that a UFO?
PF-I hope it's been made with sustainable materials.
SG-What a pair of ******!
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So you see, Mr Lerner, sir, that's a defensive midfielder!
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Faulkner: Not easy this is it?
Randy: Nope this is a really shit picture with fuck all funny about it, how in the hell are we going to get a decent caption out of this?
This.
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Lerner: "So... when do the players start learning to catch standing up?"
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Lerner to Faulkner: We'll go through it once again. Near...far away...
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Faulkner to Lerner:
Well, it apparently goes; "we pick ourselves up, we go again, brother. Right about now, the Villa way brother, pick ourselves up, we go again brother..."
With apologies to Kippax
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Faulkners Diets. Part One.
" This week I 'ave been mostly standing around with me hands in me pockets doing nothing. "
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Faulkner: Not easy this is it?
Randy: Nope this is a really shit picture with fuck all funny about it, how in the hell are we going to get a decent caption out of this?
Please feel free to post something better and offer a prize out of your own money.
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It was his entry Lee. I know we're all getting nervous mate...
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"We need to get Brad back - Shay's not as focused as he used to be."
Clever.
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2 dickheads and a stranger watch a shit keeper training!
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Ah, so that's 'football', you say?
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Next up, Shay's going to give us a demonstration of something Doug invented back in the 70's… it's called 'The scorpion kick'.
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Lerner: "I might not know much about soccerball, but I know Cooper sure ain't gonna win no damn caption competition".
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Lerner: "I might not know much about soccerball, but I know Cooper sure ain't gonna win no damn caption competition".
As good as DeKuip's was, I think we have a winner.
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Lerner: One day, my Ginger Prince, all this rotten, stinking mess will be yours...
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Randy, has only got one ball
However, it's as big as the Albert Hall
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Seriously though, who is the suit beside our two boss men?
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Seriously though, who is the suit beside our two boss men?
"The Man". Damn "The Man".
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Randy to PF "Is that a touchdown?"
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Randy. He looks a lot bigger on my tv at home.
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Faulkner: Not easy this is it?
Randy: Nope this is a really shit picture with fuck all funny about it, how in the hell are we going to get a decent caption out of this?
Please feel free to post something better and offer a prize out of your own money.
It was a joke Leeg, please don't take it the wrong way, I just couldn't think of anything!
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P.F. So boss if week sack those two groundsmen. We have half our summer transfer buget.
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Faulkner: Not easy this is it?
Randy: Nope this is a really shit picture with fuck all funny about it, how in the hell are we going to get a decent caption out of this?
Please feel free to post something better and offer a prize out of your own money.
It was a joke Leeg, please don't take it the wrong way, I just couldn't think of anything!
No problem. Just a bit tired and crabby after work.
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PF: "Yes boss, £260m very well spent, yes indeed."
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PF: Ok, so in this training exercise we have 11 players continually taking pot shots at the goalie from all angles of the box.
RL: Seems a bit harsh, In a real game he would have some kind of defence in front of him to protect him a little wouldn't he?
PF: Erm...so the theory goes.
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'Randy' - ''I'm selling up and fronting a Pet Shop Boys tribute band''
Faulkner - ''Ohhh Sir, can I join and be the one in the background who does next to fuck all? It's my speciaility.''
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Hero and villains
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Groundsman sacked for metal detecting at Bodymoor Heath.
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Randy: Yeah! Touchdown!!! Man, I've never seen one of those before!
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RL "Good catch but why isn't he running to the other end of the field with it?"
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RL.... "Oi ginga, how long have you been mates with Phil Daniels and why is he doing Sir Graham impressions?"
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'Randy' - ''I'm selling up and fronting a Pet Shop Boys tribute band''
Faulkner - ''Ohhh Sir, can I join and be the one in the background who does next to fuck all? It's my speciaility.''
Haha, the best by far.
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Seriously though, who is the suit beside our two boss men?
I think it's Brian Doogan, head of Media.
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"We need to get Brad back - Shay's not as focused as he used to be."
The winner. Clever.
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Please PM me to arrange collection from VP or postal delivery.