Heroes & Villains, the Aston Villa fanzine

Heroes & Villains => Heroes Discussion => Topic started by: Legion on December 15, 2011, 05:52:34 PM

Title: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Legion on December 15, 2011, 05:52:34 PM
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer (http://myoldmansaid.tumblr.com/#14230539848)

Quote
Downing the Judas bastard, left Villa to increase his pay.
Or if you ask Andy Carroll, maybe it’s because he’s gay.
He gave us one good season, then shat on the claret and blue.
From Villa Park to Stewart Downing, a merry festive FUCK YOU!!
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Rigadon on December 15, 2011, 06:04:37 PM
Because he's gay?  Spoilsport alert, but really?

He deserves to be booed (as futile as this is) though. 
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Legion on December 15, 2011, 06:05:31 PM
Because he's gay?  Spoilsport alert, but really?

He deserves to be booed (as futile as this is) though. 

I don't like the second line either. Suggest an alternative?
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Rigadon on December 15, 2011, 06:07:57 PM
"cause he likes his pay"?

"in the champions league he won't play"?

"PLease give back all our sick pay"?

As we can guess though, it'll be FCUK OFF DOWNING YOU **** BBBBOOOOOOOOOOOO
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Dave Cooper please on December 15, 2011, 06:32:28 PM
Downing the Judas bastard, left Villa to increase his wad
And if you've never seen him, he looks a little bit like Bod

Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Rudy Can't Fail on December 15, 2011, 07:01:54 PM
No balls,
the twat has got no balls,
the twat has got no balls,
the twat has got no balls.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: VillaAlways on December 15, 2011, 07:09:06 PM
A good old fashioned Stoooowart Downing.... Wot a w*nker,wot a  w*nker... And on and on and on
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: timeoutbigbar on December 15, 2011, 08:08:02 PM
Probably won't play anyway, so something along the lines of

You can't get in the team
You can't get in the team
You dirty judas bastard, You dirty judas bastard, You dirty judas bastard....
You can't get in the team.

Simple and easy to remember.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: brian green on December 15, 2011, 08:09:36 PM
Downing the Judas bastard left Villa to make a few quid

Nobody really loved him Just wanted to get rid

Went to the 'The Mighty Reds YNWA' stuffed with Randy's dollars

We all hope Emile Heskey follows.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Chris Harte on December 15, 2011, 08:35:43 PM
"He gave us one good season"

Did he bollocks.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: PeterWithesShin on December 15, 2011, 08:56:46 PM
Hamsters actually have quite big bollocks compared to their size.

Anyway, a few rousing choruses of "one gutless bastard, there's only one gutless bastard" might do the trick.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Ross on December 15, 2011, 09:05:55 PM
I hope Hutton decides to get stuck in for once.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: joe_c on December 15, 2011, 09:12:00 PM
(http://img843.imageshack.us/img843/4650/stulittle.jpg) (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/843/stulittle.jpg/)

Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: frankmosswasmyuncle on December 15, 2011, 09:13:25 PM
I hope...
just before he gets changed he goes for a piss, gets his foreskin stuck in his zip and has to go to Heartlands where they decide to amputate. Well, he hadn't got any balls anyway so it wouldn't be spoiling a complete set.

Too much detail?

I do worry about myself at times....
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Steve R on December 15, 2011, 11:53:43 PM
Don't even ignore him.

Unless, of course, he tries to come the bertie big bollocks and does a David Platt. In which case let the appreciation begin.

I still don't think he was all that good, and 20 mill for him was more in our interests than Liverpool's.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Louzie0 on December 16, 2011, 12:04:57 AM
A big sigh when he comes on the pitch, is mentioned or touches the ball.

I don't think he rates a song but definitely a sigh. 

Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Shoody on December 16, 2011, 12:21:15 AM
He never had a song when he was here...why bother now?

Stan deserves one first before past players..
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: lordmcgrath5 on December 16, 2011, 08:26:38 AM
"He gave us one good season"

Did he bollocks.

Oh yes he did. He was our best player last season for me.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: not3bad on December 16, 2011, 10:26:38 AM
"He gave us one good season"

Did he bollocks.

Oh yes he did. He was our best player last season for me.

And me.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Pete3206 on December 16, 2011, 10:28:43 AM
Twat. I hate him and he's just bound to bloody score isn't he?
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Mister E on December 16, 2011, 10:52:06 AM

the twat has got no balls.

Mind you, when you think about it have you ever seen a twat and balls on the same body?
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: darren woolley on December 16, 2011, 10:59:54 AM
I hope he scores an own goal.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: PeterWithe on December 16, 2011, 11:30:02 AM
I hope he scores an own goal.

That's a bit heartless.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Concrete John on December 16, 2011, 11:38:16 AM

the twat has got no balls.

Mind you, when you think about it have you ever seen a twat and balls on the same body?

Never been to Bangkok then?
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: JUAN PABLO on December 16, 2011, 11:48:14 AM
if there is only win left this year , please make it this one
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: not3bad on December 16, 2011, 11:52:54 AM
A big sigh when he comes on the pitch, is mentioned or touches the ball.

I don't think he rates a song but definitely a sigh. 



I think he rates a load of abuse.  If anybody rates abuse it's him.  With some players I don't agree with the sh*t they get, with this one I do.

Downing the one legged winger
Was healed up by Villa Docs
The he f*cked off to Scouseland
That's the way it goes with cocks
He said he wasn't leaving
Little Stew's a liar too
And so from all at Villa
We just want to say f*ck you...
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Dave Cooper please on December 16, 2011, 12:37:43 PM

the twat has got no balls.

Mind you, when you think about it have you ever seen a twat and balls on the same body?

the twat has got no balls.

Mind you, when you think about it have you ever seen a twat and balls on the same body?

Never been to Bangkok then?

Damn, beat me to it.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Chris Harte on December 16, 2011, 01:00:32 PM
"He gave us one good season"

Did he bollocks.

Oh yes he did. He was our best player last season for me.

And me.
Average at best for me.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: LeeB on December 16, 2011, 01:11:58 PM
"He gave us one good season"

Did he bollocks.

Oh yes he did. He was our best player last season for me.

And me.

Easily pleased.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Ads on December 16, 2011, 01:16:12 PM

the twat has got no balls.

Mind you, when you think about it have you ever seen a twat and balls on the same body?

... then I flipped it over and it started up first time.

Never been to Bangkok then?
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: not3bad on December 16, 2011, 01:22:23 PM
"He gave us one good season"

Did he bollocks.

Oh yes he did. He was our best player last season for me.

And me.

Easily pleased.

Does this has to turn into a another "how good was Downing thread".  Those who didn't think he was any good can content themselves by saying the people that voted for Downing as player of the year by a comfortable margin are easily pleased as above.  However none of that is relevant now as whatever he was he is now a traitorous c*nt.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: joe_c on December 16, 2011, 02:01:13 PM
"He gave us one good season"

Did he bollocks.

Oh yes he did. He was our best player last season for me.

And me.

Easily pleased.

Does this has to turn into a another "how good was Downing thread".  Those who didn't think he was any good can content themselves by saying the people that voted for Downing as player of the year by a comfortable margin are easily pleased as above.  However none of that is relevant now as whatever he was he is now a traitorous c*nt.


Indeed. I think the best assessment of his worth to the team is to say that he has a reasonable claim to have been our best player in what was largely a forgetable season, the lily-livered, caramel-kidneyed, custard- coloured cad. PS Stewart, I really hope your new agent doesn't mis-appropriate your funds like his predecessor and I mean that most sincerely.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: ADVILLAFAN on December 16, 2011, 02:38:21 PM
Somehow I knew that hamster-bollocks referrred to Downing....
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: rutski on December 16, 2011, 03:04:10 PM
Louie. If I sing that on Sunday would you mind? Absolutely brilliant words!
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: frankmosswasmyuncle on December 16, 2011, 03:22:56 PM
"He gave us one good season"

Did he bollocks.

Oh yes he did. He was our best player last season for me.

And me.
Average at best for me.
Me too CH.
Always thought he had potential and we saw it on occasions but I can't help feeling he never gave us 100%. But then I think he's the sort of player who never gives 100% to anyone. His recent comments (can't remember where I saw them?!) about how you could get away with stuff at the Villa but you can't at Liverpool sort of sums him up. Almost saying he could have done better but couldn't be arsed! Now he's with a "top club" he can be arsed?
Typical modern footballer?
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: brian green on December 16, 2011, 08:12:24 PM
Custard coloured cad.   I love that.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Villa'Zawg on December 16, 2011, 09:54:26 PM
"Maybe the fans will give a wee bit of apprehension-inducing stick, shall we say." McLeish on Downing today according to Mat Kendrick
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Handsworth Wood Villa on December 16, 2011, 10:41:28 PM
Stewart 'Traitor' Downing

From this:

Quote
Yes, I am happy here. There is speculation that players are going to clubs all the time but I am happy here. Since the first day I came here I have enjoyed every minute

Quote
A lot of faith went into me when Martin paid a lot of money for me when I was injured

Quote
On a personal note I want to do well because the club put a lot of faith in me

Quote
It's a family club. You feel very welcome and there's a great environment. I love the fact the team has great ambition for the future

Quote
I'm looking forward to next season already. We're looking to really progress

Quote
I am thoroughly enjoying my time at Villa. Even though it's been a frustrating season, I see the bigger picture and the ambition of the club

Quote
It’s part and parcel of being a player and doing well. Ever since I was young I’ve read stories saying ‘you’re going here, you’re going there.' Obviously if you have a good season you get linked, but I’m happy here

Quote
There are terrific players here. I’m confident, despite this season, that we’re going in the right direction and, if we get the right players in, then I’m happy

Quote
The important thing in football is if you’re happy, then why change it. I know it’s been a disappointing season but I can see the bigger picture

To this

Quote
My agent had a recent meeting with our chief executive. However, I am 26, and at a major crossroads in my career, so I won't be committing to a new deal at the moment

Quote
I want to keep playing and enjoying my football. When I was injured that made me realise what it can be like to be out for such a long time. It hurt. The most important thing is to play football, but I do want to play in the Champions League at some point

Quote
With England as well, all the top players play in good teams. I'm no different

Quote
You just want the best for your career. You want to finish with medals at the end of it so, if it's a step up with Villa or with someone else, then I'm ready for it

Quote
You watch teams in the Champions League and it makes you wish you were there. You sit at home and watch it, hear the music come on, you see the teams and you think 'that's where you want to be.
It's the pinnacle. It's the best. It's the best standard with the best players. It would be nice to taste that one day

Quote
My agent had a meeting with the club - just one meeting - and he just felt it was the right time not to sign my contract

Quote
Will I be at Villa next season? I'm not sure

Quote
You hope they do (understand) but normal fans will want you to stay at their club for the rest of your life. If you do leave there's obviously a bit of bitterness there

Quote
You hope they do understand because, it's like any job, if there's a better job on hand, or a better level to do it, then people do it

Quote
It's up to their fans and their opinions of me. If they want to be loud and clear with what they think of me, then that's fine

Let's give the ungrateful little prick 90 minutes of unadulterated abuse.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: joe_c on December 16, 2011, 11:05:05 PM
Custard coloured cad.   I love that.

Nicked, like all my best material. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oA7n1QvjZ_g#t=5m12s)
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Louzie0 on December 16, 2011, 11:27:46 PM
Stewart 'Traitor' Downing

From this:

Quote
Yes, I am happy here. There is speculation that players are going to clubs all the time but I am happy here. Since the first day I came here I have enjoyed every minute


To this


Quote
My agent had a meeting with the club - just one meeting - and he just felt it was the right time not to sign my contract


Quote
You hope they do understand because, it's like any job, if there's a better job on hand, or a better level to do it, then people do it

Quote
It's up to their fans and their opinions of me. If they want to be loud and clear with what they think of me, then that's fine

Let's give the ungrateful little prick 90 minutes of unadulterated abuse.

I'm curious as to when you decided that SD was not a player you would want to support.  He was actually very good for us last season, particularly during the last few matches when some commentators had written us off.

In fact I was surprised when he went. I don't think I'm the only supporter who was surprised, compared with say, Ash leaving, which loads of us could see happening and a lot of us understood. 
Ungrateful little whatever - certainly. He jumped ship. Did you know all this (in your post) before he did that?

If not - why on earth post this now.  Yes we know and we don't need it! Come on, TRS-T, stop beating the drum.     
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: paulcomben on December 16, 2011, 11:55:05 PM
£20 million. That's ours. 0 assists. 0 goals. That's theirs.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Handsworth Wood Villa on December 17, 2011, 12:03:19 AM

I'm curious as to when you decided that SD was not a player you would want to support.  He was actually very good for us last season, particularly during the last few matches when some commentators had written us off.

In fact I was surprised when he went. I don't think I'm the only supporter who was surprised, compared with say, Ash leaving, which loads of us could see happening and a lot of us understood. 
Ungrateful little whatever - certainly. He jumped ship. Did you know all this (in your post) before he did that?

If not - why on earth post this now.  Yes we know and we don't need it! Come on, TRS-T, stop beating the drum.   

Well Downing was my favorite Villa player. I even had his name on the back of my shirt.

But as soon as he came out with these quotes and what not at the end of last season (May or June), that's when I felt betrayed.

Also if you remember there was an England game vs Switzerland at Wembley in early June which I think finished 2-2.

I remember the press interviewed both Downing and Young.

They were both Villa players but they were of course asked about their future at the club.

Young was very respectful "concentrating on the England game" "will talk to chairman" etc etc

Downing was trying to engineer above to Liverpool "i'm ambitious" "want to win trophies" "ready to make a step up" etc

Before that I loved him.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Greg N'Ash on December 17, 2011, 12:16:18 AM
As most people would acknowledge,he wasn't an important player for us even given his decent form under GH. The ones who were important, Young, Barry, Milner, to be fair i was gutted to see them go but they put a shift in over their time with us and you had to say, well you're not gonna win anything with us so good luck really

However, Downing owed us this season i thought, given we took on a crooked player and when he did recover, played him back into form because he was shocking for a long while.

To be fair maybe Lerner wanted the money, but Downing was obviously tapped-up and the way he turned once he saw a better offer is why footballers are held in such low esteem. Can't see the point of targeting him with chants because he obviously won't give a shit.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Rigadon on December 17, 2011, 08:58:38 AM
He has come to symbolise the disappointment following raised expectations being dashed.  I think he did owe the club another season and for that I think he deserves some of the stick he'll get if he plays.  To have gotten this far in football he must have some guts, but I do think he might be the kind of player that would be a bit intimidated - he wouldn't have ever experienced it before.  Bit like Barry last season.

Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: CJ on December 17, 2011, 10:26:27 AM
My repertoire for tomorrow will consist of:-

Judas

Stewart Downing, what a wanker, what a wanker, what a wanker, what a wanker

And of course - Boooooooo
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: The Laughing Policeman on December 17, 2011, 10:52:18 AM
How about an updated version of a classic song..........
In that Liverpool slum
In that Liverpool slum
They buy a player they think is great
But we all know he's a traitorous twat
In that Liverpool slum.

Or this one.......
Thank you very much for the twenty million
Thank you very much
Thank you very, very much.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: not3bad on December 17, 2011, 11:05:43 AM
As most people would acknowledge,he wasn't an important player for us even given his decent form under GH. The ones who were important, Young, Barry, Milner, to be fair i was gutted to see them go but they put a shift in over their time with us and you had to say, well you're not gonna win anything with us so good luck really

However, Downing owed us this season i thought, given we took on a crooked player and when he did recover, played him back into form because he was shocking for a long while.

To be fair maybe Lerner wanted the money, but Downing was obviously tapped-up and the way he turned once he saw a better offer is why footballers are held in such low esteem. Can't see the point of targeting him with chants because he obviously won't give a shit.

Yes, I could soberly reason like that or I could shout "Downing you WANKER! Booo!" every time he touches the ball.  Depends which choice is the more fun really.

I think I've decided.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: Damo70 on December 17, 2011, 01:46:12 PM
I like the 'thankyou very much for the twenty million' idea. I prefer something like that that makes fun of him and Liverpool to something that makes us look bitter (even if we are).
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: The Laughing Policeman on December 17, 2011, 05:43:37 PM
Just back from the pub where we were discussing tomorrows game and Mr. Downing's name cropped up.A bloke standing near us over heard what we were saying and butted in with "Downing? If he was on fire I wouldn't piss on him to put the flames out"
Class. ;D
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: damon loves JT on December 17, 2011, 08:04:46 PM
Because he's gay?  Spoilsport alert, but really?

He deserves to be booed (as futile as this is) though. 

I don't like the second line either. Suggest an alternative?

`Or, if you ask Andy Carroll, maybe it's because he is a useless fucking ****** with a heart like a sesame seed'
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: jimmygreen on December 17, 2011, 08:19:12 PM
Still undecided about the whole affair then Damon?
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: damon loves JT on December 17, 2011, 08:24:30 PM
I wish I could afford to be less bitter.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: frankmosswasmyuncle on December 17, 2011, 08:26:57 PM
Hope the fu**er chokes on his balti pie!

I gave him a lot of stick when he was with us because I thought he deserved it!
I'll be very happy to give him a load more tomorrow.
I bet the poor sods who sit next to me are already packing the ear-plugs!
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: barrysleftfoot on December 17, 2011, 10:23:28 PM


  How about the old classic Oh I Do Like to be Beside the Seaside........replacing West Brom/Birmingham with the offensive word Downing.

  I really like that song, succint, and catchy.
Title: Re: A song for hamster-bollocks?
Post by: luke25 on December 17, 2011, 10:42:18 PM
Hope the fu**er chokes on his balti pie!

I gave him a lot of stick when he was with us because I thought he deserved it!
I'll be very happy to give him a load more tomorrow.
I bet the poor sods who sit next to me are already packing the ear-plugs!
Thats the one boys, lets go with this.
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