Heroes & Villains, the Aston Villa fanzine

Heroes & Villains => Heroes Discussion => Topic started by: PaulTheVillan on July 01, 2010, 06:13:12 PM

Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: PaulTheVillan on July 01, 2010, 06:13:12 PM
The place to be, obviously (http://soccernet.espn.go.com/news/story?id=804717&sec=england&cc=5739)
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: pauliewalnuts on July 01, 2010, 06:21:40 PM
He won't get much done whilst he's still obsessing over Tina and Graham.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: PaulTheVillan on July 01, 2010, 06:24:00 PM
Michelle Keegan would certainly get it.

I'll tell her on twitter.

:)
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Phil from the upper holte on July 01, 2010, 06:26:13 PM
First Villa player to break my heart. I don't feel anythin towards the shit now.

I hope he's a better coach than he is a manager!
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: KevinGage on July 01, 2010, 06:28:25 PM
He talks a good game, I'll give him that.

Brian Clough even mentions him in his book, I don't think he was very impressed. Any time I've heard him recently he sounds like he has swallowed a coaching manual and vomits out buzz words and stock phrases to sound current.

Barely a good word to say about the Villa either, the  spoon faced bloater.

It's a shame one of our better ex players can be so utterly dislikeable, but there you go.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: march on July 01, 2010, 06:29:50 PM
David Silva leaves Spain to be coached by Platt, you could not make it up.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Monty on July 01, 2010, 06:32:33 PM
He really knows nothing about football. It's a classic example of a club appointing a famous ex-player for 'know-how', even though that player has shown no pedigree in coaching and clearly relied on talent and instructions from above during his career. They'd do better to appoint Simon Kuper as a consultant or Tim Vickery as a scout.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: pauliewalnuts on July 01, 2010, 06:35:11 PM
Did Platt play with Mancini at Sampdoria?

Slight tangent, but whenever I hear him mentioned now (Platt), i think of the very accurate observation someone once made on here, that his face looks like the reflection of a "normal" person's face in the back of a dessert spoon.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Monty on July 01, 2010, 06:38:24 PM
Platt did indeed play with Mancini at Samp. Mancini also played with Savage at Leicester, why doesn't he just sign him up? To be fair, Savage has always sounded more sensible than Platt whenever I've heard him.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Walmley_Villa on July 01, 2010, 06:39:52 PM
Can't wish old balloon face any luck I'm afraid. I remember being at Highbury when he played for them and was injured. He was in a box above the Villa fans with his wife. Cue Villa fans "What the f*cking hell is that..." No wonder he hates us...
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: TheSandman on July 01, 2010, 06:44:03 PM
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"
Did Platt play with Mancini at Sampdoria?

Slight tangent, but whenever I hear him mentioned now (Platt), i think of the very accurate observation someone once made on here, that his face looks like the reflection of a "normal" person's face in the back of a dessert spoon.


Me too.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: pablopicasso_10 on July 01, 2010, 06:49:06 PM
the single most boring cretin on tv....
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: curiousorange on July 01, 2010, 06:50:16 PM
I always thought he looked like Robocop when he took off his helmet.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: TheTimVilla on July 01, 2010, 07:02:37 PM
Quote from: "Walmley_Villa"
Can't wish old balloon face any luck I'm afraid. I remember being at Highbury when he played for them and was injured. He was in a box above the Villa fans with his wife. Cue Villa fans "What the f*cking hell is that..." No wonder he hates us...


Or the time he played in goal at Highbury and seemed more keen on joking with their fans. Not good when you're losing five nil.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Rip Van We Go Again on July 01, 2010, 07:07:52 PM
He has the sort of face you see when you look through your front door spy hole.

An arrogant twat after he made the grade with us.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Moorski on July 01, 2010, 07:26:48 PM
Mancini needs someone to put out & collect in the cones, cue fat head!
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: TaxDodger on July 01, 2010, 07:51:08 PM
His tactics coloum in Four Four Two used to be laughable. It made Mike Bassett sound like a genius.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: FrankyH on July 01, 2010, 08:08:47 PM
I vaguely remember him being interviewed when  he got the Forest job,and started spouting off about wanting to be England manager.Just what a supporter wants to hear when your new manager is unveiled.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Matt C on July 01, 2010, 08:34:05 PM
I hope he weaves some of the coaching 'magic' he delivered at Forest.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Clampy on July 01, 2010, 09:03:59 PM
A poor manager and coach he was/is, but what a bloody good player. One of my early favourites. I remember GT saying that he thought he'd paid £500k too much for him. One of the rare times in his first spell that Taylor was wrong.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: dave.woodhall on July 01, 2010, 09:19:25 PM
Quote from: "clampy"
A poor manager and coach he was/is, but what a bloody good player. One of my early favourites. I remember GT saying that he thought he'd paid £500k too much for him. One of the rare times in his first spell that Taylor was wrong.


Luckily Chef Scout Doug said "No, Graham, you are mistaken. This young lad will be like a son to me and is easily worth the money. In fact, I wouldn't be at all surprised if he doesn't become the saviour of English football and moves to Italy for £5 million. Take this blank cheque and buy him."
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Exeter 77 on July 01, 2010, 09:20:04 PM
Quote from: "clampy"
I remember GT saying that he thought he'd paid £500k too much for him.


I think that may be £50k as he cost £200000. SGT paid the extra £50000 because Watford were prepared to pay £150000.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: mozza on July 01, 2010, 09:36:23 PM
Memory plays tricks but recall his first touch on debut was chest/thigh/lay off ........was it Ewood Park?

Rated him as a player but didn't he **** up the u'21 squad ?
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: TopDeck113 on July 01, 2010, 09:52:02 PM
Great player for us, but yet another in a line whose ingratitude to the club who help make him is staggering.  

Came back from Italia '90 and couldn't wait to get out of Villa Park.  Signing up for language lessons wasn't so he could order spaghetti alla carbonara in his local Italian.

His eventual destination was the 1991 equivalent of going to Citeh:  all Bari had was money, but no pedigree.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: SaluteIanTaylor on July 01, 2010, 09:58:53 PM
So why do all Villa fans hate him?
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: pauliewalnuts on July 01, 2010, 10:01:51 PM
Quote from: "SaluteIanTaylor"
So why do all Villa fans hate him?


Made his name with us, since when he's acted like we never existed.

The reason i hate him these days is his inability to pronounce "Agbonlahor" when co-commentating on us.

"Agbonalahaaar" indeed, spoon face.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Monty on July 01, 2010, 10:03:42 PM
Quote from: "TopDeck113"
His eventual destination was the 1991 equivalent of going to Citeh:  all Bari had was money, but no pedigree.


Bari weren't so bad, just a provincial club trying to brighten the desolate, desparate surroundings, constantly unsuccessful, nothing like City at all...
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Mazrim on July 01, 2010, 10:06:17 PM
I always think that somebody drew a face on a balloon and then inflated it when I see him.
The saft twat.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Clampy on July 01, 2010, 10:22:24 PM
Quote from: "Exeter 77"
Quote from: "clampy"
I remember GT saying that he thought he'd paid £500k too much for him.


I think that may be £50k as he cost £200000. SGT paid the extra £50000 because Watford were prepared to pay £150000.


Yes, i meant £50k. Ooops.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Clampy on July 01, 2010, 10:23:43 PM
Quote from: "dave.woodhall"
Quote from: "clampy"
A poor manager and coach he was/is, but what a bloody good player. One of my early favourites. I remember GT saying that he thought he'd paid £500k too much for him. One of the rare times in his first spell that Taylor was wrong.


Luckily Chef Scout Doug said "No, Graham, you are mistaken. This young lad will be like a son to me and is easily worth the money. In fact, I wouldn't be at all surprised if he doesn't become the saviour of English football and moves to Italy for £5 million. Take this blank cheque and buy him."


And he discovered Yorke you know.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: dave.woodhall on July 01, 2010, 10:28:19 PM
Quote from: "clampy"
Quote from: "dave.woodhall"
Quote from: "clampy"
A poor manager and coach he was/is, but what a bloody good player. One of my early favourites. I remember GT saying that he thought he'd paid £500k too much for him. One of the rare times in his first spell that Taylor was wrong.


Luckily Chef Scout Doug said "No, Graham, you are mistaken. This young lad will be like a son to me and is easily worth the money. In fact, I wouldn't be at all surprised if he doesn't become the saviour of English football and moves to Italy for £5 million. Take this blank cheque and buy him."


And he discovered Yorke you know.


Really? He kept that quiet.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Nev on July 01, 2010, 10:44:56 PM
You can see why he didn't make it as a manager when you watch him on TV.

Monotone, humourless, poor pronunciation and with all the insight and understanding of Mongo from Blazing Saddles.

I prefer pundits who are more or less impartial but who, now and again, reveal a warm affection for their previous clubs. I've heard more affection for Villa from T****r F*****s than I have from Elephantitis head.

I don't really dislike Mancini, but with Moonface on the scene it will help my dislike of the nouveau riche.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: curiousorange on July 01, 2010, 10:52:48 PM
It's odd to think that at a time when England players are being hauled over the coals for their insularity, you could point to Platt and say that he learned absolutely nothing from his years on the continent.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: pauliewalnuts on July 01, 2010, 10:53:40 PM
I know it probably isn't de rigeur to admit it, but Trevor Francis always seems highly complimentary to us when he does our games on Football First on Sky.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: dave.woodhall on July 01, 2010, 10:56:02 PM
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"
I know it probably isn't de rigeur to admit it, but Trevor Francis always seems highly complimentary to us when he does our games on Football First on Sky.


We're the only people who know who he is.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: KevinGage on July 01, 2010, 11:10:17 PM
I've often felt that as well.

If you were a neutral, didn't know his background and missed some of the less than charming ditties we used to sing about him, you'd assume TF must have played for us at one stage.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Guy M on July 01, 2010, 11:26:52 PM
Quote from: "Nev"
You can see why he didn't make it as a manager when you watch him on TV.

Monotone, humourless, poor pronunciation and with all the insight and understanding of Mongo from Blazing Saddles.

I prefer pundits who are more or less impartial but who, now and again, reveal a warm affection for their previous clubs. I've heard more affection for Villa from T****r F*****s than I have from Elephantitis head.

I don't really dislike Mancini, but with Moonface on the scene it will help my dislike of the nouveau riche.

He certainly looks like he's been feasting on loads of those candy-grams that the mailman delivered.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: willywombat on July 02, 2010, 04:31:12 AM
He's never forgiven us for booing him on his first visit to VP as an Arsenal player. Came as a terrible shock to him apparently.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Simon Ward on July 02, 2010, 10:01:31 AM
Still the best player I've seen down VP since Sir Brian though!
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Des Little on July 02, 2010, 10:32:08 AM
Bloody hell if he's the best they could get (and they can have any coach in the world), it doesn't look good.  Horrible smug twat (in that order)
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Risso on July 02, 2010, 11:54:53 AM
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"


Slight tangent, but whenever I hear him mentioned now (Platt), i think of the very accurate observation someone once made on here, that his face looks like the reflection of a "normal" person's face in the back of a dessert spoon.


That person was........you!
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: cheltenhamlion on July 02, 2010, 12:59:19 PM
Quote from: "willywombat"
He's never forgiven us for booing him on his first visit to VP as an Arsenal player. Came as a terrible shock to him apparently.


That was the game where he scored against us, celebrated the goal and then ran to the Holte End at the end of the game expecting a heroes welcome. Twat.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: pauliewalnuts on July 02, 2010, 01:05:18 PM
Quote from: "Risso"
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"


Slight tangent, but whenever I hear him mentioned now (Platt), i think of the very accurate observation someone once made on here, that his face looks like the reflection of a "normal" person's face in the back of a dessert spoon.


That person was........you!


No, I got it off someone else on here, am sure.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Chico Hamilton III on July 02, 2010, 01:06:29 PM
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"
Quote from: "Risso"
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"


Slight tangent, but whenever I hear him mentioned now (Platt), i think of the very accurate observation someone once made on here, that his face looks like the reflection of a "normal" person's face in the back of a dessert spoon.


That person was........you!


No, I got it off someone else on here, am sure.


wasn't that Frankie Boyle's description of Rebecca Addlington?

Platt reminds me of an onion
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: The Man With A Stick on July 02, 2010, 01:31:39 PM
Well I think he looks like one of those pumpkins you see at halloween.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Rip Van We Go Again on July 02, 2010, 01:34:38 PM
He looks like Fred Eliott from Coronation Street, after a dose of ringworm.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Chico Hamilton III on July 02, 2010, 01:37:41 PM
Quote from: "Mark Fletcher"
He looks like Fred Eliott from Coronation Street, after a dose of ringworm.


Ashley, I've been stabbed in the neck by a rent boy. I say stabbed in the neck by a rent boy.....
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Rip Van We Go Again on July 02, 2010, 01:42:48 PM
Quote from: "Chico Hamilton III"
Quote from: "Mark Fletcher"
He looks like Fred Eliott from Coronation Street, after a dose of ringworm.


Ashley, I've been stabbed in the neck by a rent boy. I say stabbed in the neck by a rent boy.....


Ah yes.
The infamous stabbing where he claimed he was giving the young man 'acting lessons.'

I'm fairly certain that rent boy stabbed him twice. Once in the neck and once in the arse.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Martyn Smith on July 02, 2010, 01:45:14 PM
I was told he looks like Tin Tin...
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Lee on July 02, 2010, 08:22:39 PM
I have to say that I loved Platt as a player. Yeah, he thinks fuck all of us now, but I have some great memories of watching him play.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: myf on July 02, 2010, 10:45:21 PM
Thought he was a Man ure fan as a kid?
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Lee on July 02, 2010, 11:55:49 PM
Quote from: "myf"
Thought he was a Man Man Utd fan as a kid?


He was/is
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: TimTheVillain on July 03, 2010, 10:00:35 AM
I think he's got a fish face.

Ugly fukker !
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Risso on July 03, 2010, 11:34:51 AM
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"
Quote from: "Risso"
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"


Slight tangent, but whenever I hear him mentioned now (Platt), i think of the very accurate observation someone once made on here, that his face looks like the reflection of a "normal" person's face in the back of a dessert spoon.


That person was........you!




No, I got it off someone else on here, am sure.


You're being modest, this is the earliest posting I can find that mentions it:

Click (http://www.heroesandvillains.info/discuss/viewtopic.php?p=808547&highlight=face+spoon#808547)
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: peter w on July 03, 2010, 11:50:06 AM
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"
I know it probably isn't de rigeur to admit it, but Trevor Francis always seems highly complimentary to us when he does our games on Football First on Sky.


In my trolley-dolly days I did a flight with a Spanish girl going to Paris. a bit of flirting and before you know it its drinks in my room at the hotel. we were getting on famously and indulging in what some may term medium to heavy petting, but something just didn't feel right.

So after a few minutes of more small talk so I could try and put my finger on why this fit Spanish bird, with all defences down, was suddenly not good enough for me, it suddenly dawned on me. Her eyes were just a dead ringer for Trevor Francis's.

Well that was that. From the eureka moment in reverse I realised the night was doomed. We met up once more to see if the moment was playing tricks on me, but no, she was but one step[ away from a Devonian accent by then and a Blues shirt so the moment had gone. Bloody Francis.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Percy McCarthy on July 03, 2010, 11:59:18 AM
Quote from: "Risso"
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"
Quote from: "Risso"
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"


Slight tangent, but whenever I hear him mentioned now (Platt), i think of the very accurate observation someone once made on here, that his face looks like the reflection of a "normal" person's face in the back of a dessert spoon.


That person was........you!




No, I got it off someone else on here, am sure.


You're being modest, this is the earliest posting I can find that mentions it:

Click (http://www.heroesandvillains.info/discuss/viewtopic.php?p=808547&highlight=face+spoon#808547)


Paulie's modesty is well-placed. I think it was me. Can't find it though so you might just want to trust me. It is typical of my legendary wit after all. ;-)
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Lucky Eddie on July 03, 2010, 02:01:31 PM
Quote from: "Chico Hamilton III"
Quote from: "Mark Fletcher"
He looks like Fred Eliott from Coronation Street, after a dose of ringworm.


Ashley, I've been stabbed in the neck by a rent boy. I say stabbed in the neck by a rent boy.....






Just when I was thinking that I'd had enough of the self congratulating, sucking up to Dave, 'already being discussed here', better in my day, type posts; someone posts an absolute belter like this to make me laugh out loud.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: pauliewalnuts on July 03, 2010, 02:22:36 PM
Quote from: "Percy"
Quote from: "Risso"
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"
Quote from: "Risso"
Quote from: "pauliewalnuts"


Slight tangent, but whenever I hear him mentioned now (Platt), i think of the very accurate observation someone once made on here, that his face looks like the reflection of a "normal" person's face in the back of a dessert spoon.


That person was........you!




No, I got it off someone else on here, am sure.


You're being modest, this is the earliest posting I can find that mentions it:

Click (http://www.heroesandvillains.info/discuss/viewtopic.php?p=808547&highlight=face+spoon#808547)


Paulie's modesty is well-placed. I think it was me. Can't find it though so you might just want to trust me. It is typical of my legendary wit after all. ;-)


I definitely stole it from someone, and it was definitely on here, so you're probably right.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Arsey on July 03, 2010, 04:08:06 PM
Man City have already spent massive money on 3 midfielders (Boateng, Silva and now Toure) are they  really going to spend another 30 million on Milner???

I think Barry is going to be spending most of next season warming a bench, very effectively too.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: saunders_heroes on July 03, 2010, 04:10:53 PM
Quote from: "Lee"
I have to say that I loved Platt as a player. Yeah, he thinks fuck all of us now, but I have some great memories of watching him play.


Same here. Couldn't give a flying fuck what he thinks of us now. He was still fantastic in a Villa shirt, and that's all that matters to me. The silly abuse he gets from some on here is embarrassing. Platt was dynamite in a Villa shirt. That's what really matters.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: TheSandman on July 03, 2010, 04:13:04 PM
Quote from: "Arsey"
Man City have already spent massive money on 3 midfielders (Boateng, Silva and now Toure) are they  really going to spend another 30 million on Milner???

I think Barry is going to be spending most of next season warming a bench, very effectively too.


You're right there but Boateng is a Centre half/full back rather than a midfielder.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Arsey on July 04, 2010, 09:58:23 AM
Quote from: "TheSandman"
Quote from: "Arsey"
Man City have already spent massive money on 3 midfielders (Boateng, Silva and now Toure) are they  really going to spend another 30 million on Milner???

I think Barry is going to be spending most of next season warming a bench, very effectively too.


You're right there but Boateng is a Centre half/full back rather than a midfielder.


ahhh I thought he was primarily a DM.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: PaulTheVillan on July 04, 2010, 12:04:21 PM
Quote from: "Arsey"
Quote from: "TheSandman"
Quote from: "Arsey"
Man City have already spent massive money on 3 midfielders (Boateng, Silva and now Toure) are they  really going to spend another 30 million on Milner???

I think Barry is going to be spending most of next season warming a bench, very effectively too.


You're right there but Boateng is a Centre half/full back rather than a midfielder.


ahhh I thought he was primarily a DM.


He can pretty much a job anywhere at the back.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: exiled on the wirral! on July 04, 2010, 01:12:27 PM
Quote from: "saunders_heroes"
Quote from: "Lee"
I have to say that I loved Platt as a player. Yeah, he thinks fuck all of us now, but I have some great memories of watching him play.


Same here. Couldn't give a flying fuck what he thinks of us now. He was still fantastic in a Villa shirt, and that's all that matters to me. The silly abuse he gets from some on here is embarrassing. Platt was dynamite in a Villa shirt. That's what really matters.


I totally agree, Platt was one of my first heroes and his record for us speaks for us. In 1990/91 he kept us up single handedly with 24 goals for a team that stopped up on the last day. I keep hearing this about platt and Andy Gray that they never say a good word about us, but i personally havent heard them say a bad word about us either. At the end of the day they work in the media and have to give a balanced view. As far as Platt scoring and celebrating in front of the Holte End, thats complete bollocks, cauuse i was there and he refused to celebrate when he scored a diving header.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: smudger on July 04, 2010, 02:37:45 PM
Quote from: "exiled on the wirral!"
Quote from: "saunders_heroes"
Quote from: "Lee"
I have to say that I loved Platt as a player. Yeah, he thinks fuck all of us now, but I have some great memories of watching him play.


Same here. Couldn't give a flying fuck what he thinks of us now. He was still fantastic in a Villa shirt, and that's all that matters to me. The silly abuse he gets from some on here is embarrassing. Platt was dynamite in a Villa shirt. That's what really matters.


I totally agree, Platt was one of my first heroes and his record for us speaks for us. In 1990/91 he kept us up single handedly with 24 goals for a team that stopped up on the last day. I keep hearing this about platt and Andy Gray that they never say a good word about us, but i personally havent heard them say a bad word about us either. At the end of the day they work in the media and have to give a balanced view. As far as Platt scoring and celebrating in front of the Holte End, thats complete bollocks, cauuse i was there and he refused to celebrate when he scored a diving header.


He has got a fat face though, and a balloon shaped head.
Title: Fat face joins Man City
Post by: Olneythelonely on July 05, 2010, 05:29:02 PM
It must take him about 4 hours to wash his face.
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