Are you an Aston Villa fan?
If the answer to that question is a resounding 'yes' then read on.
If it is 'no' then move along please. This doesn't concern you - you wouldn't understand!
The following list, put together with help from Villa blogger Colin Abbott and friend Andy 'Turnstile' Ullah, encapsulates many of the feelings associated with being a Villa supporter.
It gives a flavour of what it means to be a Villan, but is by no means definitive.
Claret and blue experts, we are happy to expand this list - or even create another one with your help and suggestions - but please enjoy 49 things that sum up what following the Villa is all about.
1) Standing bemused as Big Ron took to the pitch with a microphone to assure us he was trying to sign Dean Saunders and pronouncing the striker's surname as if he had KFC's secret recipe.
2) Loving Ron's namesake (who is not his son - Karren Brady) Dalian Atkinson waltzing through to score goal of the century at Selhurst Park. Then being upstaged by Rainman, the brolly-wielding fan.
Dalian Atkinson celebrates a goal with Dean Saunders and Ray Houghton in the Wimbledon 2-3 Aston Villa league match at Plough Lane, Saturday 3rd October 1992.
3) Remaining eternally grateful to Peter Withe's shin. Of course he meant to hit it like that.
European Cup Final at De Kuip Staium in Rotterdam. Aston Villa 1 v Bayern Munich 0. Villa's Peter Withe celebrates after he scored the game's only goal. 26th May 1982.
4) Never tiring of the fact Villa have lost the FA Cup more times than Blues have won it... (from when it was stolen from a sports shop in Aston on September 11 1895).
Harry Burge shows how he allegedly stole the FA Cup in the Sunday Pictorial in 1958.
5) Having an aversion to Scottish managers
6) But quite liking those called Ron...
7) And liking opposing players called Ronnie after Liverpool striker Rosenthal missed a sitter in front of the Holte End
Liverpool striker Ronnie Rosenthal in action against Aston Villa
Breathing a sigh of relief that Villa don't play Rangers regularly
9) Remembering when Nigel Kennedy was Villa's most famous fan
Mirrorpix Aston Villa fan and violinist Nigel Kennedy
10) Humming Chris Price's chant whenever you see a bald bloke. "He's got no hair but we don't care, Chrissy Chrissy Price."
11) Bursting with pride when Villa charitably donated their shirt sponsorship to Acorns
12) Wondering who actually invented the bicycle kick, after being told numerous times it was Herbert Douglas Ellis.
13) Dreading the announcement of the England squad in case there is a Villa player in it. We all know what happens next.
14) Feeling relieved that you will never be as under-the-thumb as David 'Does your missus know you're here' Unsworth.
15) The hairs standing up on the back of your neck when you watch this video
[ Invalid YouTube link ] Legion: Sorted!
16) Remembering when a goal of a certain vintage at Villa Park was greeted with the scoreboard message 'Simon Stainrod Drives Montego' during the club's links with Austin Rover.
17) Wondering what Dr Jo made of this Birmingham Evening Mail headline.
18) Rejoicing in the fact Chris Nicholl had scored four goals in one game - and then realising half of them were own goals as Villa drew 2-2 with Leicester.
19) Wishing Randy Lerner was as good at appointing coaches as he was at laying on free coaches.
20) Laughing as the Villa club shop stocked up with Savo Milosevic bandanas only for the striker to never wear one again after his original introduction to the fans.
21) Beaming with delight when John Carew swept a ball boy up into his arms during Villa 5 Blues 1 in 2008.
22) Remembering (or being told by your elders about) battering European Champions elect Liverpool 5-1 at Villa Park in December 1976 with doubles from John Deehan and Andy Gray and a goal from Brian Little.
23) Hearing the Life of Riley by the Lightning Seeds and reminiscing about Match of the Day's goal of the month, which seemed to always feature two or three Villa goals under Big Ron
24) Dwight Yorke finishing his warm up routine by running from the Holte End to the player's tunnel with the ball either resting or bouncing on his head.
25) Getting a warm feeling whenever David Platt's Cheshire cat grin greeted another Platty goal
26) Coming together to support Stan Petrov's brave battle
27) Dreaming of wearing those Proud History Bright Future scarves again rather than using them as dusters
28) Smirking at the 'We're not fickle, we just don't like you' banner aimed at David O'Leary.
29) Enjoying the only time you've been pleased to see traffic cones - Villa fans in fancy dress at Tottenham in May 2014.
30) Witnessing the original 'one of our own' Ian Taylor score in a fairytale day at Wembley in 1996. Savo and Yorkie's goals weren't bad either!
31) Leaving Villa Park with toilet seats, bits of rubble and other souvenirs following the Holte End's last stand
32) Buying a copy of Heroes and Villains outside the ground. "New issue out today, only a pound..."
33) Relishing John Gregory's sound bites about Dwight Yorke, guns, electrodes and referees' goolies
34) Wishing you were as 'fat' as David Ginola when he removed his shirt after Gregory accused him of being overweight.
35) Being more infuriated by Martin O'Neill's non apology at the infamous Moscow meal than by the team selection which sparked the fans' frustrations.
36) Fearing you will never get over May 30 2015
37) Forgiving Sir Graham Taylor's difficult second album after being eternally grateful for his brilliant first spell.
38) Reading Paul McGrath's autobiography and marvelling at the true extent of what the tortured genius put himself through, while still managing to be God
39) Loving this picture of a man who walks on water
40) Having a cheeky pint of celebration or drowning your sorrows in a Villa boozer.
41) Retaining a soft spot for these two garments, even though they never tempted you to buy a photocopier or a yoghurt.
42) Struggling to forgive or forget
43) Insert your own words...
44) Singing the lyrics to one of your favourite songs
45) Loving this video too!
Legion: Also sorted for you.
46) Forever worshipping heroes who respect the club when they leave.
47) Going back home, watching video highlights of the Tranmere semi and chuckling as commentator Alan Parry likens Shaun Teale to John Wayne during the penalty shoot-out.
48) Rather liking the way Gabby Agbonlahor responds to insults from rivals
49) Referring to this fella simply as 'Sid', as if he's a lifelong mate!
