I think we're going to stay up because Dunne is going to return in a blaze of glory, and with rising defensive midfield superstar Sylla, hit it off and meet a date with destiny, combining to make our once feeble defence water tight again; meaning we keep 7 clean sheets in a row. Meanwhile, our midfield suddenly evolves into a cohesive unit, as Sylla's defensive midfield play also links up well with Westwood and Dawkins, dispelling our delusions that we can't adapt and control midfield.
A combination of N'Zogbia suddenly realising that the instruction 'run at the defence' wasn't quite as literal as he'd understood it, medical experts suddenly discovering Gabby is a narcoleptic sleepwalker and supplying appropriate medication, and Lambert suddenly discovering that not only do birds and red bull have wings, means all the pieces of the puzzle come together.
With our defence and midfield now functioning to be able to defend and create chances, and our young guns having finally found their get up and go again (it turns out it was a cereal), our potent attacking force of the four horsemen, and Bent, and that other chap, go on a goal scoring frenzy that shoots us up the league and to mid table safety.
At the end of the season, with Premiership status and money secured, Lerner cuts his loses (and the tattoo off his leg) and sells up, to a Villa fans consortium that had just won the Euro lottery quadruple roll-over, with a little money from Tom Hanks, Nigel Kennedy, Mervin King and Prince William too. (David Cameron did ask to join but was told to 'do one')
The next season Lambert goes on to win the treble, with a young team that is set to dominate the Premiership and Europe for years to come, with the Champions League and that World Club Championship thing becoming a regular fixture at Villa park.
Lambert finally gets a knighthood and elocution lessons for his services to Villa and football in general, and most of the Villa fans, who also now own the club and are all rich, finally end up happy, now being the biggest football club in the world, lauded for their beautiful football.
The end...?
