NOT The Generals thread

[Ger Regan]

General, why have we only signed one player in the transfer window yet Liverpool have signed 4 and spent £100m. Tevez at Man City is available for £40m and I think he would be a great addition to the squad. I really can't understand why Lerner is messing about with my club. I don't give a sh*t about his tattoo, he needs to put his money where his mouth is. You say "action speaks louder than word", well what are you waiting for, sign him NOW!! If you don't it will be a clear sign the club lacks ambition and Lerner is just using the club to make money. Don't give me your spin about the wage bill, Lerner has billions, why doesn't he spend it all now, I can't understand what he playing at.

B6 is probably closer to Argentina and all, so he'll be closer to his kids. You know it makes sense, G Kizzle.

[bertlambshank]

General,is the rumour true that the reason Downing was asked to go because he was caught with his penis in a Balti pie and he asked one of the Acadamy guys to lick it off?

[Rudy Can't Fail]

General, why have we only signed one player in the transfer window yet Liverpool have signed 4 and spent £100m. Tevez at Man City is available for £40m and I think he would be a great addition to the squad. I really can't understand why Lerner is messing about with my club. I don't give a sh*t about his tattoo, he needs to put his money where his mouth is. You say "action speaks louder than word", well what are you waiting for, sign him NOW!! If you don't it will be a clear sign the club lacks ambition and Lerner is just using the club to make money. Don't give me your spin about the wage bill, Lerner has billions, why doesn't he spend it all now, I can't understand what he playing at.

B6 is probably closer to Argentina and all, so he'll be closer to his kids. You know it makes sense, G Kizzle.

Exactly, Ger. I posted this 5 minutes ago and he still hasn't replied. Why is he hiding from us?

[Vancouver]

General,

Are you now able to comment on transfer and team affairs? Did the boys play their hearts out this week?

[pauliewalnuts]

the silence is deafening, General.

I expect he'll be back when we swoop for SWP next month.

[Villa'Zawg]

General,

If toast always lands butterside down, and cats always land on their feet, what would happen if you strapped a heavy piece of buttered toast to a cats back and dropped it?

And General I think you missed my original question. Why can't I buy mouse flavoured cat food

[Risso]

General

I'd just like to say well done to you and the board for giving Mcleish the manager's job, and for selling Young and Downing.   Ignore the fickle idiots, I still have faith that appointing managers with two recent relegations on their CV, and selling your best players is good for the club as well.

[Olneythelonely]

General,

Waaaaaahhhhhhhhh........waaaahhh.....waaaaaahhhhh...

Oln

[tremzvillain]

General,

Socks. Why is it that no matter how many millions of pairs of socks I buy, I never seem to have any?

[Vancouver]

General,

How is this years kit launch coming along? Will I be able to order a shirt for Xmas? Will there be any ladies shirts?

And why hasn't the Birmingham senior cup been mentioned???

[Mazrim]

General, you big cowardly Lion. I asked earlier how many retro Peter Withe armbands the club has sold, yet you have chosen to do something else than spend every hour of the day on this site like real fans. Typical. Will you answer please and if the number is less than a million can you ask Randy to sell the club please.

I was supposed to end this post with a petulant childish remark for the purpose of hurting your feelings but in reality making myself look like a complete twat. But I was distracted by my own flatulence and I've forgotten what it was.

[TheTimVilla]

General

Is it true you wrote on Villa Talk that you'll never post on H&V again because "they're a bunch of faggots"?

Can I have your autograph? It's not for me, you understand. It's for my nephew, TimVilla.

[Dazvillain]

GK, linking a couple of earlier questions together, does Nicky Keye wear claret and blue mascara ?
...or indeed does Mrs K for those "special occassions " ?

[VillaZogmariner]

General,

As I'm sure you are aware, a dog owner has the responsibility of picking up their pet's dog shit when going for a walk. So who picks up the Guide Dog's shit?

[TheTimVilla]

General

I posted something twenty minutes ago and you *still* haven't replied. I'm sure that I speak on behalf of all Villa fans when I tell you this means that Randy is going to sell Villa. Can you confirm? Bring back Ellis, that's what I say.

(can you put some kisses on the autograph?).