The Big Sam
"First signing for West Ham? A new secretary. Gertrude is a nice enough woman but she looks like Gene Hackman"
"If a woman wants to work with Big Sam she needs to stir up a fire in my loins. I want a lass who enchants the balls right off me. Sexually."
"Told Gertrude she was sacked. It was awful. She asked why. I simply pointed at her face, her breasts and her arse. I hope she understands."