tiny% Villa:Toon Circus coming to to TV near you

[Toronto Villa]

Ah yes. It really wouldn't be a proper football season without those champions of the completely ridiculous cheering us all up with their day to day events. The new home of our very own plonker Stephen Ireland is set to explode once again. If selling their beloved Andy Carroll wasn't enough, the following revelation by the departed Carroll is sure to see several thousand naked fat bastards burning effigies of another fat bastard:

The England striker said that he had been "pushed out the door" by Ashley whose chairman Derek Llambias negotiated a club record fee for the 22-year-old. Carroll, currently injured, was flown to Liverpool by private jet. The replacement for Fernando Torres, sold to Chelsea for a British transfer record of £50m, Carroll texted a fans' website to express his disgust at his former club.

Carroll, whose fee broke the record paid for a British player, said: "I'm gutted to be leaving my hometown club, I was told to go. I didn't want to leave that's why I signed a five-year deal [with Newcastle in October]. I was pushed out of the door."

Hope you enjoy your stay in the jungle Stephen. You'll find out very quickly that being at Villa wasn't so bad after all.

[Rudy Can't Fail]

Here you go:

http://www.fansonline.net/newcastleunited/article.php?id=599

It's going to be fun up there. *snigger*

[Linus]

Pushed out the door, pausing only to sign a written transfer request...

[Hookeysmith]

Pushed out the door, pausing only to sign a written transfer request...

Dont be stupid someone must have wrote it for him and he just put his mark on it - probably with his huge forehead

[Chris Harte]

Well from those texts it looks as though he didn't sign a transfer request.

[Rudy Can't Fail]

Expect the shit to hit the fan later today. Good times.

[BannedUserIAT]

Ashley must be a Sunderland fan. Is there any doubt left? What else can he do except turn St.James' into a shopping centre?

[BannedUserIAT]

Andy Carrol said:
'Mate, mate, mate, mate...'

[eastie]

Not exactly what liverpools fans would want to here from their new record signing , didn't want to go , pushed out the door , similar to Stephen Ireland joining us maybe?

Carroll has always said he loved newcastle and wanted to always stay and I believe Ashley has forced him out- Ashley wants the money and I'd be surprised if pardew sees anywhere near half the cash to spend-where will the goals come from now?

They are 2 points above us and along with Blackpool I think they will really struggle to survive now.

[Brend'Watkins]

The England striker said that he had been "pushed out the door" by Ashley whose chairman Derek Llambias negotiated a club record fee for the 22-year-old. Carroll, currently injured, was flown to Liverpool by private jet. The replacement for Fernando Torres, sold to Chelsea for a British transfer record of £50m, Carroll texted a fans' website to express his disgust at his former club.

Carroll, whose fee broke the record paid for a British player, said: "I'm gutted to be leaving my hometown club, I was told to go. I didn't want to leave that's why I signed a five-year deal [with Newcastle in October]. I was pushed out of the door."

That flight must have took all of 5 minutes. 

With all the buzzing of footballers around the country in helicopters and planes it's a wonder there wasn't a mid air collision.

I think Ashley did the right thing.  £35 m for what is basically a novice striker is brilliant business. 

[Dave P]

If that is true then it is sensational.  The fans of 91 league clubs all love Mike Ashley apart from the ones at the club he is at.  Marvellous.

[Mister E]

Two points: One, he's bound to say something to soften his departure, and Ashley is the major-league hobby horse in carToon land. So Carroll gets his glittering, big-money move without his family's houses being torched.
The other point: he is this era's Duncan Ferguson - a big bruiser with a temperament which will lead him into problems.

[eastie]

Ashley has pissed Newcastle fans off many times before, selling the stars and not investing the monety on players is nothing new to him , I said in the transfer thread at the time he would want Carroll to request a move to divert the flak.

No replacement lined up at all, how much will pardew get of the money to spend ? Maybe £15m on players at best I'd expect , I don't feel sorry for Newcastle fans because he's pissed on them time and again and will continue to do so - wake up and smell the roses you magpies fans!

[Phil from the upper holte]

Haha

Losers, Couldn't happen to a nicer club

[The Left Side]

Haha

Losers, Couldn't happen to a nicer club

Exactly!