Stuff I didn't need to know about ex-players

[Damo70]

You might remember about ten years ago a guy wrote a book about his season with full access behind the scenes at Coventry. The press picked up on a comment by Alex Ferguson to the Coventry Chairman about the size of Dion Dublins plonker. This was followed by John Gregory telling the world that Michael Oakes was even bigger in that department. Last week I was reading a book by the ex Leeds and Everton player Ian Snodin where he compliments Brendan Ormsby on his size. I wasn't 100% comfortable with possibly being the leading authority on ex Villa players endowments so I thought I would share this burden of unwanted knowledge. Maybe we can all save it to drop into polite party conversation!

[Chico Hamilton III]

The lads team I played for as a kid had Brendan Batson as an honoury chairman. Once, in about 1978, he invited us all to watch the Albion first team train ( Big Ron, Cyrille, Robson, Cunningham, Tony "dropsy" Godden etc).

Anyway, after the session we were invited in to the changing rooms to meet the players and I can confirm that Cyrille has the biggest cock I've ever seen. You wouldn't like it for a nose.

Even The Situation would feel compelled to stare at it in the showers

[DeKuip]

We've had a few big plonkers down the Villa over the years.

[Lee]

I once met Ian Snodin in Southport after the Sir Grahams last game at Everton ( the legendary 3-3 ane he was on the Everton injury list at the time). I stuffed my fingers into his Chips and Gravy and talked a fair bit about football and trying to pull some of the local totty.

Nice bloke.

[darren woolley]

Having a big plonker is not something i would want to know about Villa players.

[Marlon From Bearwood]

Apparently Patrick Viera has a right weapon on him too

[PeterWithe]

I once met Ian Snodin in Southport after the Sir Grahams last game at Everton. I stuffed my fingers into his Chips and Gravy

I've never heard it called that before.

[damon loves JT]

Yes, but of all professional footballers, who has the *smallest* penis? I reckon Dennis Wise is hung like a vole

[OzVilla]

Listeners to the halcyon days of Danny Baker will know that John Wark was renowned for having a penis the size of a drawing pin.

[Damo70]

I reckon we should ask Danielle Lloyd, she seems to have done more practical research than most. Or maybe my mate Adam who spends his life on line. He has in the past reliably informed me that tinternet wisdom declares that a lower league player called Dave Walton is the largest footballer in that department.